can’t go on
May 6th, 2005 by SandraMy husband of fifteen years left me without warning on November 4th, 2004, we had both just celebrated our 50th birthdays . No sign, I saw nothing coming, neither did his or my family. We have no kids.
He assured me no other woman was involved. In the weeks that followed I discovered on the internet that he had been registered since June on a web dating service and had found someone.
We have a company together to which I no longer have access. Many things had been hidden from me there too.
In the last four years, I have had some strange health problems – accidents ending with a broken back bone when he left (I fell, he was not violent).
It has been six months, and all the news I get from him is that he has gone to Bali (never enough to go on a trip with me) is he has never looked back. He never asks about me…he has dropped me like a piece of garbage.
When I met him he had no money, no car, furniture etc, had a record. We lived in my home and always complained that I didn’t want to sell him part of my home (my parents home).
Now that he has left so abruptly, I cannot get over the sudden , and to me, heartless departure. I have been taking anti-depressants etc, and seeing a therapist but these suicidal thoughts and thoughts of desperation are getting worse. I live alone and am at my wits end trying to encourage myself not to do anything.
I am an only child and my parents are dead. I don’t know where to go or what to do. If I could only be sure that I would do this right, no problem, the thought of messing my suicide attempt and staying gaga I suppose is what is holding me back for the moment.
Have always felt less that perfect, never good enough, pretty enough (although I seem to have no problem attracting men), my heart and this voice tells me otherwise.
I miss my husband, but cannot believe that the only person I trusted and shared my life with for 15 years, and built a company together has been cheating and left with someone else as if it was perfectly normal. just writing about it turns my stomach.
Sandra

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February 14th, 2009 at 5:29 pm
Hi there – I am sorry for what happened to you. I am sure it really hurts…i hope you find someone that will love you a lot.
April 20th, 2009 at 1:24 am
I’m sorry for your loss. Betrayal is painful. I’ve had it happen twice. Most unscrupuluous people don’t have the decency to tell you what they plan on doing and can you blame them? Working through the stages of grieving (denial, anger etc.) was helpful for me. Good luck and God be with you.
August 22nd, 2009 at 8:00 am
Hi there, I’m so sorry for your loss. I hope things will get better. Be sure that there are people out there who care for you! Be strong and positive. Love