I can’t cope anymore

May 23rd, 2010by lost_va

Life is just too much for me.  Every way I look, I see signs of my own failure.  I simply cannot overcome my anxiety and depression.  My job has endless hours and endless demands and pressure and endless negativity.  Yet I’m stuck there since I can’t afford to pay this company back for all the training they’ve invested in me.  I don’t think I can do this job any longer; I’m just not smart enough, not quick enough, not able to get things done fast enough.  I really don’t think at this point I can do any job, which will eventually leave me homeless and inpoverished (not like I’m doing all that hot right now).  I see all my friends around me who cope so well, enjoy some career success and affluence, and then there’s me…

My girlfriend constantly nags me about getting engaged, getting pre-engaged, getting married.  I love her, but I cannot stand the pressure.  Once again, I cannot cope.  My mother tells me all the things she needs help with, but I’m in another city and can’t always help her. 

It’s all too much now, it really is.  I don’t really consider it suicide at this point.  More like euthanasia; a mercy killing.  I’m sure there’s people and organizations in favor of mercy killing for people like me who just cannot overcome their depression and who just cannot cope with everyday life.  The psychological pain of my life is just to great to bear any longer. 

 I just wasn’t meant to survive in this world. 

They say God has a plan for everyone… I found out his plan for me… a warning to others… don’t let this happen to you. 

Does anyone know any organizations that promote euthanasia for people who are simply hopeless?  I mean, I want to do it right and painless.

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