I don’t know what to do with my life anymore. I think i’m going to get kicked out of school. I failed my first two midterms in two of my classes and I studied my ass off for days on end for those exams and I still failed. If i don’t get straight As I’m [...]

I just lost my job in the IT industry as a tech support person.  I was 4 months into the job and then one day they just came down to my desk and told me they needed to have an interview.  I was told I was being laid off because of the economy.  I knew [...]

I was a happy child until grade 7, my life changed on me before i could react. I started cutting it was bad, then i started to OD because the cutting wasnt working anymore. One time i OD right before school and i lost it first class, it was like i wasnt there. I was [...]

So just when are we supposed to know when our purpose on this plane of reality has been used?What are we supposed to do then?It’s like a program that has served it’s purpose.When it has served it’s purpose,what happens then?Why it gets deleted of course.Shouldn’t the same be said with us?Who’s to say that our [...]

My friend Emily and I carpool to choir on Tuesdays. We are both in the Santa Maria choir, second highest in the Columbus Children’s Choir. Her mother took us to pictures on Sunday. I have recently started cutting again, and when I did it again for the first time, I hacked my arm up so [...]

In the book “Final Exit” the author states how to use Helium and a plastic bag to kill yourself and a tip I have is to figure out a way to hand cuff yourself or otherwise restrain yourself so that you don’t remove the bag after you pass out (it can happen) because I am [...]

I highly recommend the book Final Exit. I got my copy on Amazon.com and it was worth every penny…..it will likely be the book that gave me the best idea as to how I am fittin to commit suicide.

How do I describe to someone  what I have lost Everything….. Well not everything The shell of me still speaks And the pain inside the shell Swells Cries  like a baby howls  like a wounded animal Is this a self Or the remains of a holocaust Echoes of the old me s Flitting around like [...]

People say time heals all things but this is not true for everything. I’ve been depressed since I can remember….Always hating myself and the way I looked and my bisexuality and just everyone that ever hurt me or made me feel worthless and inadequate and ugly and stupid. For more then a decade I have been suicidal [...]

Watching this documentary greatly helped me to understand that there is NO loving god that cares about you and made it MUCH easier to accept what I must do. Check it out on Youtube and tell me it doesn’t make you feel more at peace with having to die…….Zeitgeistmovie.com I am not fuckin around here, [...]