So I tried to kill myself (with good reason) a couple months ago and this guy who’s been helping me get through stuff that I’ve known for over a year made me go to the hospital and it was traumatic hell and I’ve been more screwed up since then than I was before. I’ve only spoken to him a couple of times since then, and I talked to him yesterday and reiterated all the same stuff about how it’s his fault that I had to go to the hospital and how it was stupid and screwed me up and he won’t listen and keeps saying it was my mom’s fault for not taking me to a private shrink. He told me to call him today and I spoke to him in the morning and he said he would call me later and to call him if he doesn’t call me and I just tried him and he didn’t pick up. I feel so alone. I used to have him to tell everything to but now I can’t trust him because I’m afraid if I say the wrong thing he’ll have me shut up in the hospital again and I can’t do that. I want to just end it so that way I don’t have any of these bad memories anymore because they screw me up really bad. I just want to talk to the damned bastard because I still love him and I hate him and he won’t pick up, his phone is off, and I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m home alone. I could kill myself easy this time.
3 comments
I’m sorry It sounds like you been through alot. Maybe he’s just busy, I don’t know tho :/
Ur in the right place; there are many great people here.
I’ve had mixed experiences w/ hospitalization. Last time I said I would never go back, but recently I’ve been thinking it might be nice. Kinda like a mini vaca. Btw, I have a wife n four kids so it would be nice to have some quiet time! lol
youre just like any other girl, freaking out because your boyfriend didnt pick up the phone this 1 time (not having a go at you all women are like that). You need to chill, he will call you and maybe its not so bad if you go to hospital in fact i had an emotional breakdown today and i had to go to 2 different hospitals, you are not alone and you are in the right place 🙂