I had a big future ahead of me, not to brag or anything but I’m pretty smart for my age, and kind of attractive, awesome grades and stuff, good health, etc. then I got culture shock(in a foreign country). try living without any friends or social life for a year. I stopped taking my “happy” pills (they’re not exactly antidepressants)because they weren’t working. I went into a deep depression and tried to kill myself several times but I stopped like 2 months ago. I really miss cutting and burning my arm, its all my dad’s fault. he thinks he’s helping me, taking away things I love […]
July 2011
my urge to cut has gotten really bad i wanna do it
I am a 15 year old that has had the roughest years ever to start i think i might be anarexic cuz i skip lunch and think im fat all the time and weigh 140 lbs. My parents hate me they actually make fun of me and dont take my opinions into account and my dad found gay porn on my computer i mean i dont really wanna be gay it all started in 4th grade everyone called me gay cuz i hung out girls so i turned gay cuz everyone said so and im not proud of it and i dont get horny […]
Ok hi everyone I’m new to this and I just joined. All of you seem like good people so I’ll give it a try. So pretty much for a year or two I haven’t been feeling like myself anymore. My brain feels all messed up and I just can’t think straight. I found out not too long ago that I have anxiety and I’ve been having anxiety attacks. I’m kinda still finding out how to control it but it’s still not good. A lot of stuff has happend to me, mostly me being heart broken.. I know a girl that uses this too and I’m […]
I am not sure why I came to this site. I have been there. I cry everytime I read that people are hurting so.
So many of you are so young, it’s so sad to hear your giving up. I went thru the same horrible crap when I was your age too. I tried a few times to leave but never worked out right.
I still have times where I don’t think I can make it anymore but I pull thru. Life is what you make it. There is help to get out of home situations if you can not take it anymore.
Please live […]
I am sorry that I didn’t tell you “I love you” more. I am sorry that I didn’t push you into conversations about how I could help fix us so that we could have understanding of each other to create a happy life. I wish I hadnt beleived that “He will out grow it” advice from family and freinds. I wish you had trusted that you could come to me and tell me something was bothering you, but it was my fault because our relationship was so in turmoil and I couldnt fix it. Daniel I wish I could bring you back so I could […]
Hello everyone. I’m not depressed, nor have I ever been, and I won’t even begin to pretend that I understand how you must be feeling. I’ve been lurking this site for a while, but I thought that perhaps I might recommend some music to you all as a means of coping. I know that it’s not going to fix anything, but the following albums are incredibly immersive, and if any of you happens to be able to fall into one of them for any amount of time then I believe that this post was successful.
Nick Drake – Five Leaves Left/Pink Moon
The Antlers – Hospice
im 16 years old… i cant bare to stay another year, on this earth, i just want to lose it all. ive had the worst life, i was abuse by my father and step mu, i saw my mum getting bashed by her boyfriend, i’ve been hit by a car, and i’ve also been raped….. i just cant do it anymore i just want to end it all but i’m scared. I’m scared for the people i’m going to leave behind. i have three jobs. i’m trying to help out mum, i cant, i’m useless. i just want to end it all give up the […]
I was playing video games and my cousin comes by telling me that if I wanted to go to the mall. I not wanting to just stay home every day I went with him and his gf n baby. He’s 2 years older. The best part was after we came home and played video games. He said,” Hey, Nathan, wanna blaze it again?” I of course said yeah. We got an apple and smoked about 4 bowls before I got really high. I love it cuz it makes me talk a lot more but I can’t think straight. Hard to focus, no coordination. Stupidity caused […]
I need to do a speech for school on “What’s right with the world”. I can’t even think of anything to do it on. What a bad topic..
Hey. I just found this site, im suffering from depression, and have been thinking of ending my life. I feel unloved and alone. People around me keep lying to me and using me. Im miserable, Im losing my house and my girlfriend has left me. I work as a police officer but am finding it extremely hard to cope. I have taken a week off work. Am very upset and confused. Thinking bad thoughts.
I feel like crap. I’m a teenage girl, and I’ve realized that I will always be treated like shit. most guys are so fucking independent, and most girls are so dependent on guys. and notice I say the word “most” because there are some others that are different, it’s just so fucking hard to find the different ones. I so badly want a guy that practically needs me to live, I know that’s really selfish, but I can’t help it. that’s the way I am, I need someone to live. I’ve tried to find my own happiness in anything I can, I’ve tried about everything, […]
When your mother dies in your arms from the common flu you’re never the same. It is true what they say about being able to tell when a person’s soul leaves their body. Their eyes glaze over. They become unfocused black pools. It’s not a major event. It’s very tiny but it’s life changing. They say you go through stages of grief, but I think that’s all total bullshit. I never felt angry and I never felt the need to forgive her death. I feel absolutely nothing. Not that I didn’t love her. I loved […]
I see a lot of euthanasia groups are directed towards those suffering from physical ailments and terminal illness.
However, it’s never mentioned for those with life long mental illness which is what I suffer from.
My psychiatrist never told me what he diagnosed me with, but I suspect that I have schizophrenia, somewhere along that spectrum since
I was being prescribed anti-psychotics.
I’m not able to make friends or relationships with anyone or am I able to work anymore.
I live probably the most sad miserable life I can think of. The worst part about it is no one seems to understand.
Or care. Ive […]
i m going to end my miserable life.how?? first i’ll get heavily sedated with alcohol then immerse myself into bathtub then i’ll drown to death.no pain at all.
KILL ME NOW
KILL ME NOWÂ KILL ME NOWÂ KILL ME NOWÂ KILL ME NOWÂ KILL ME NOWÂ KILL ME NOW!!
I’M INSANE! I GET IT GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE NOW. I HATE YOU. I HATE ME. LET ME DIE.
Fuck it…
I’m sick of all of this…
I don’t need to deal with it…
I’m tired of crying everyday…
I’m tired of you being an asshole…
I’m tired of me being a complete *****….
I’m tired of it all, all that you fucking do daily….
I’m going to eventually die because of you anyway…
Just kill me already, kill me with your bare hands, you want to…
Though you’re not physically abusive, it’s close enough… Emotionally… Mentally…
I hate you.
When you shouted at me and told me to shut the fuck up, and slammed the fucking soda can on the bed side table in one swift movement and caused the entire thing to explode in less […]
bartender pour another
to quiet all the thunder
that rages in this soul
i lived life undirected
then over-corrected
now i swerve out of control
time to make a change
can’t live another day
grieving for the ones stolen away
i stare into myself
but the mirror on the shelf
says i don’t deserve love anyway
dear god i’ve begged to you
but you’re fictional/untrue
so my prayers went unheard
i turned to lust and sex
and did so without regret
but my passion would not burn
i’ve had good intentions
but received only contention
self-pity is a sin
so i’ll turn back the clock
take the safety off this glock
let’s […]
I’m sick of living here. Â Its hots, there are only two window units in this double wide trailer, in the middle of Texas during the summer. Â I wake up after two hours of sleep, sweating. Â There are roaches all over the kitchen, our only bathtub is unstable and its made out of plastic. Â Its also broken and duct taped together, and we cant fix any of this because were so fucking poor. Â My mom and I were fighting about this and she was telling how bad other people have it, well just because other people have it worse doesnt mean we have it good. Â I […]
I wake up this morning after a night of loneliness and crying inside.
Actually, I only really cried once, but the rest of the night was just thinking too hard and hurting on the inside. For anyone who didn’t read my last two posts, I just found out the girl I like has a boyfriend. And I’m sick of waiting for the school year to come about to start something new, so I don’t know what’s going to happen. This is worse than it looks because now everytime I try and tell myself “we’ll fix stuff eventually, just think ahead”, I’m gonna realize that I don’t […]