I’m dying in the inside. I’m screaming for help, but no one hear me. I’m devastated. I feel like I’m all alone in this crazy world. My heart cries out, but no one there to comfort me. All I want is someone to tell me that I’m gonna make it out alive. I’m sitting in this dark tunnel underground. I can see people walking by above me. No one bother to look down whenever i scream for help. I’m praying that someone would hear me and some how get me outta this dark place. A day goes by, still down here. I keep telling myself […]
October 2011
I want to go.
Everyone here knows why. If you are reding this you genreally understand what it feels like to be suicidal. To want to leave, go to sleep and never wake up, depart this life. I want out.
I knew a girl who killed herself in college. I don’t blame her one bit, but what really struck me was that despite how small, quiet, invisible and inconsequential she was in life, her death had the most enormous effect. There wasn’t one person unaffected by her act, no matter how remotely they were connected to her. She is not remembered for the person she was, she […]
Goodbye.
that’s all I can think of.
no suicide note, no guilt. Just, goodbye. I was a good kid, honestly. Now I’m only 13. Still so young and have nothing to look forward to me. Honestly what’s there good when you live in a piece of shit that your “family” can barely afford? You try to tell your family you don’t like it there but they seem to never care. Yeah, that’s always it. No one cares. No one sees how much they can hurt a person, but that doesn’t matter to them. They just don’t care. All my life I’ve done nothing but care […]
Useless. that’s all I am, left in the dust while everyone else seems to be heading forward. Getting looks from parents as if they wouldn’t ever want a daughter like me, distress lays inside of me. How should I feel knowing I’m forgotten, and treated differently? People say it’s okay all the time, but I know a true friend would tell you when it isn’t. The only true friend I had barely talks to me anymore considering she moved and found new people. Now I’m left alone, with a bunch of poeple around me that I would never want to be with in my life. […]
You know what im done. Im seriously done. Today was that last straw. They litterally push me off the edge. What did i do wrong. I want to know the answer. What have i done wrong. I never talk to them if they talk to me. I dont really care for them. They are extermely loud i could possiblly loose my hearing. They dont know how much they already kill me and they did. They really did. I dont want no apology cause thats not enough. I hate my school so much i rather get my ged then get a dioplama. As long as i […]
Ok, I’m gonna go from this site, forever. Im not only gonna go from this site, Im gonna go from everything. Yes I said it. Im gonna kill myself… sorry, but bye!
There are 5 simple steps to ending one’s own life.
Step 1: Decide on a method (In my case lethal drug)
Step 2: Look into ways of acquiring anything needed (Trawling the internet for resources)
Step 3: Acquire any items needed (I’ll be sending payment tomorrow, should take 5-7 days for it to arrive fingers crossed – I’m 95% sure the person isn’t a scam artist)
Step 4: Prepare for the final scene… (In my case writing the note, tying up a couple of loose ends, getting everything set up, etc)
Step 5: Do it.
I’m only halfway there, and alot hinges on whether this person I came into contact with […]
I QUIT!!!
After a long time of hoping and praying, hoping and praying, hoping and praying, and trying to be optimistic, I feel like I have really hit rock bottom. The taste of motivational thoughts, sayings, videos, etc only last so long, and then reality hits once again with anothe rejection or dissapointment. There is little change or progress after so much effort, and I feel so hurt and betrayed, abandoned and alone.  Thoughts of ending it all are, and have been, a constant companion. But I don’t have the courage at this time to end it (at this time, anyway). I think about what my […]
My name’s Zach. Â I am nineteen years old. Â I am not currently suicidal but have just gotten through a bout of strangeness that I think most people on this site would appreciate, in that it involved me acting out in front of others so that they might know what sorts of violence were going on inside of my psyche.
My first miseries occurred, though I am luckier than some in that my family is intact and I’ve committed no unintentional acts of grievous harm. Â Today I am rather puzzled as to why I’d previously found suicide a pleasant prospect at all; in contrast to the pain […]
I’m afraid to get help because then they’ll take my power to kill myself away from me. I want this choice. I relish it. I’m not killing myself because ‘I want to die’ but because its a punishment I feel I deserve for not living up to my own expectations. When I break the expectations that I hold for myself, I no longer want to live and seeing a PsyD or PsychD will only change my mind as to what I will do when my expectations aren’t met. Look up “suicide” on Google. Every result is about prevention. These websites have taught me what I […]
There is tooooo much to deal with. Go away life. I just want to sleep all day and not have to deal with any of this shit.
The thing that REALLY keeps me from doing it is that I’m too scared. I just think about it is all. I think the least painful, but scariest death is to jump off a bridge. But my mangled remains would be too gruesome, I’d like a neater death than that. I think about hanging myself, but I don’t want to have bulgy eyes and blue face. I think about slitting my wrists, but I’m afraid I’m going to lose blood slowly and and freak out as it’s happening- I’ve given blood before, and I hate the feeling of blood leaving my body and make me […]
If you were to find me
Dead in my bed tomorrow,
My suicide note would be
The broken heart of a little girl
Abused & judged by her father.
If you were to find me
Hanging by a rope tonight,
My suicide note would be
Something stolen from an innocent girl,
Something she can never regain.
If you were to find me
Pouring rivers of crimson on the floor,
My suicide note would be
A lifetime of tears shed
Over dreams long lost & forgotten.
If you were to find me now,
Dying one second at a time
My suicide note would be,
The only wish I never lost,
“I wish it would just end.”
The love of my life left our apartment one week before my 34th birthday. Now, a month later, he’s completely disappeared. Changed phone numbers, don’t know exactly where he lives.
Pieces of him and his things are still laying around. I packed them up and sought out his house tonight to give them to him. He opened the door and I fell apart. Crying so hard I couldn’t catch my breath.
Yes, I was awful to him. I didn’t mean to be. I was in a weird place, stress, work, and way depressed. And he moved in two weeks after we got together. Not a good way […]
Swallow Swallow Swallow
Innocent you think,
Swallow Swallow Swallow
The pills make you sink,
Swallow Swallow Swallow
Your eyes flutter shut,
Swallow Swallow Swallow
“Why didn’t she just cut?”
Weird, huh? Mom has not succeeded in giving her kids as much love, support, security, happiness and wants to leave them to someone who can and step out. It seems I’m the source of all the suffering of my children, their father, my ex-boyfriend. My family doesn’t back me up. Even at work, I’m told I’m not that great. Yep. I suck.
That’s all I’ve ever wanted to do. To give my children the feeling of worthiness and love I never felt I had. But I’ve failed miserably. I have a daughter whose room and […]
Does slitting ur wrists work, is ther a Gud chance of success?
But I need to get it out. Saying it aloud makes it too real. I can’t handle it if it’s that real… So I found this site and maybe if I start getting it out here, it will be easier to handle.
When I was little I, about 9 or so, I don’t remember for sure my memories are muddled and broken up, I had a babysitter. I don’t remember how long I went there. But I remember I didn’t like it there. I felt awkward from the moment I started going. Well, she had a daughter who was about 13 and a boyfriend who was always angry. […]
Teach me how to die.Teach me how to lie.Teach me how to get over myself.Teach me your tricks.Teach me your plan.I wanna know!How are you all so perfect?