I don’t understand why people always get so upset about this subject or why there is such a social stigma about suicide. If I can choose to take the life of my unborn child, legally, why can’t I choose to take my own life? I honestly don’t understand why that is wrong. The most ardent pro-choice people I know are totally against suicide. People don’t like suicide because of how it will affect them, personally. They are not thinking about the pain the person who wants to die is going through; they are thinking of their own pain of losing someone.
When I say, “suicide is a choice”, I am talking about with legal, consenting adults, preferable over 25 (**see the last paragraph for more on that). I will use myself as an example.
I am 40 and have been through some major things in my life, like most people. My life is/has been better than some peoples and worse than others. I am very honest about who I am and where I have been, with myself and others. I really don’t understand why suicide is wrong. In fact, I think it would be a good thing for those around me. I have a 17 year old daughter…her college education would be paid for with me dead. I have a new husband of just over a year. If I die now, it will be easier than if I die in 10 years, because he will not be tied to me as much, financially or emotionally. He has two young sons. I am relatively new in their lives; if I die now, then they won’t be as attached to me and the impact will be much less (especially since they are young). In addition, my failings as a person will not continue to mess them up mentally. I know it would be painful and hard for those around me, but harder then watching me suffer and dealing with my depression?
The reality is that I battle depression and sometimes it is overwhelming. I have battled it since I was 15. Sometimes I can “win” and work through it, other times, I cannot and either quit participating in life (greatly affecting those around me) or attempt suicide. Eventually, depression will win, of this, I have no doubts. So I would like to choose to end my life on my terms and when it is, what I consider, best for my family. I have tried medications and therapy, neither being effective. I do not drink or do drugs.
Here is another example, what of when someone has a life ending illness or disease. Why should they suffer, incur the costs of trying to extend their life and put their family through watching them die and suffer, if that is not what they want. This makes absolutely no sense. If they want to live, that is cool too, but if not, why not have physician assisted suicide. For that matter, isn’t chronic depression a life ending illness or disease. In my case I believe it is. Why can’t i have physician assisted suicide?
And why is it wrong to think suicide is an okay option. And I don’t personally believe in God or a higher power, so I don’t have that hang-up. I am not looking for permission, but just wanted to give my two cents.
**Let’s be clear, I am not talking about a teen or young adult killing themselves – that is different because they do not necessarily have the mental and emotional maturity to make that choice and there is scientific evidence that the brain does not fully mature until age 25. There are reasons they are not allowed to vote, drink or drive, etc. I personally think it is dumb to get married of have children before 25. Think back about how much you changed between ages 15 through 20 and 20 through 25. Leaps and bounds, life experiences happened quickly, shaping you, changing you. Most likely, you went from someone who didn’t drive, have sexual relationships, didn’t drink alcohol or take drugs, to someone who may have done one or all of those things on a regular basis. My point, a lot of life happens at that age and you change because of the experiences. Suicide would not be an informed choice prior to age 25 because we are still being VASTLY shaped by life. I know this is a generalization and that some people do all these things before 15 and some don’t do them until after 25. I am speaking in generalities. I understand that life changes and we change after 25, but definitely not at the rate we do between 15 and 25.
12 comments
Suicide is not condemned in the bible and is not illegal here in Finland.
“her college education would be paid for with me dead”
Trust me! College these days isn’t worth losing a mother! Your daughter needs you A LOT more than she needs college!
“He has two young sons. I am relatively new in their lives; if I die now, then they won’t be as attached to me and the impact will be much less”
Pretty desperate there m8 You should seek help!
On a lot of points I agree with you. I am truly sorry things have not changed for you. I do think it is a mental/emotional condition for you. I agree with Jones if you can try professional help, if that does not work, try your family out once more. If that fails, well you have us. As you said years down the line I am very sure I will be here still. I am empathetic to you situation.
My whole point was that I do not understand why it is wrong to want to kill yourself. Because society says it is not right?
And I have been to therapy and have tried to “fix” myself/thoughts.
I have no problem with the idea of committing suicide except I am not sure that suicide ends it. I want life to make sense just as mathematics makes sense. Life must be more than the period between the cradle and the grave. If there is nothing else or no further experiences to endure than suicide should be an acceptable choice just as picking up and going across country never to be heard from again. Trust me this has nothing to do with religion. While I am pretty convinced that there is a supreme intelligence, religion is truly the opium of the masses and has done more harm to enslave people than all the auction blocks.
The ‘selfish’ argument people often fire doesn’t make much sense to me. Isn’t it the ultimate act of selfishness to keep someone alive suffering, just so you don’t have to miss him or her when this person is gone?
If we really cared about people so much, we would treat them better than our pets I would think. yet, suicide is unacceptable. Picture yourself in severe physical pain, there is nothing worse than that. I know, because that’s where I am at. Doctors won’t give me higher doses pain meds, because they are only concerned about their career and license, and pretty much don’t give a flying f** about people suffering. Yet, when you tell them ‘I can’t live like this any longer’ they go like ‘do you need to see a psychiatrist’. It’s disgusting.
I don’t think suicide will ever become a legit choice
suicide is one hell of a reality slap and people don’t like to have their bubbles busted ..
I mean, you have to give little importance to unpleasant truths about yourself & the rest of society to remain “sane” and functional these days
a suicide (breakin point of someone who’s tired of facing tremendous pain and/or censoring him/herself to adapt to society) tends to make vivid those unpleasant truths people try to look over
* breaking
* try to overlook
freedom has its price I guess
so all with all, I have been looking into methods. Helium seems to be the preferred way, but at this point I try to hydrate myself with help of pain meds. I don’t know if it’s going to work, time will tell. Day two now.
as for you SLTurner71: first I think you should ask your daughter if she is ok with your death. It could be indeed the case she needs you more then her college education.
i think of it as being a resource, as sad as that may be to some. for me, i have always been depressed and think of what a great thing it would be if i finally had something positive from my life, a gift of my organs that are only being wasted really in me, if i could give them to say, some young person, someone starting out who could have a life because i chose to end mine which was only torment, why not? it would give me at least some sort of feeling of worth, something positive i could contribute to the world, of myself, why is that wrong?
i guess i just think it should be a real option for people, for adults, to choose to go to a doctor and have their organs donated deliberately so that others can benefit