27

Is 2012 the end of MY world?

December 31st, 2011by Aki

First and foremost, Happy New Year everyone, though it seems that some of you here have had/are having a crappy time.

I’m new here, name’s Aki. I stumbled upon this site a few months/years back, but never registered. Got put off by the seeming anti suicide I was reading on here at that time (I think, I don’t know. I’ve gone through a lot of suicide sites). I’m not known or anything, but I do lurk around other sites, though they’re mostly pro. Anyways.

Here’s a brief summary of my attempted suicide history.

Started thinking about it when I was nine years old, then went through the whole emo …

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4

Just a cool vid …

December 31st, 2011by adastra

For all of you suffering a bit of heartache …we all lose sometimes ….anyway, hope you like …from my hometown ~ Melbourne ~(Goyte) is the artist.

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2

Wost New Years Ever…

December 31st, 2011by Michael

This is the worst way to spend my New Years. I know that this is really something not to get depressed or even suicidal about, but I maybe moving schools. And its not the kind of moving schools I like. I would be moving to a online school. Which means no theater, because there isn’t really anything around for me that I could do. And its new years! I shouldn’t be sitting here… I should be enjoying this day! But this keeps nagging me…. I dont know how much longer I can live with this, and my bad grades. I’ll be back on here later, …

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1

Lies

December 31st, 2011by starterjacket003

Lies mess things up. I’ve told lie upon lie to try to get through each day, week, month, year. They all come back to bite me eventually. I have a few more out there – bills about to come due. God, please make the landing gentle or erase the debt.

My mother lied to me about using my credit card without permission, even with the evidence in her face. My father tells lies – that my stepmother doesn’t hate me, that things will turn out okay. (Things might turn out okay, but he sure doubts it. I can tell.)

If I go on living, I’ll tell lies. …

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1

Happy New 2012!!

December 31st, 2011by cj

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EeeZr6uIHj4

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3

Just a thought …..

December 31st, 2011by adastra

We all inherit (to some degree) thoughts from others, be they from childhood, teenage years, or from things we have read or seen be it on the web, books or in real-life. Some peoples thoughts are good, some well intentioned, some so so, and some not so good at all (for themselves or others).

Just remember we make choices everyday with which thoughts ‘we let’ into our mind; be they our own or others (eg inherited thoughts). Make a conscious choice to let & keep good things in our mind, and trash or critique not so good thoughts, be they ours or others.

In summary, Don’t let …

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2

lost

December 31st, 2011by ridiculous

I lost the most important person to me. my grandma. i handled most of it well. i stayed strong for my family. i kept everyone postive and focused while she was dying. but upon  her death i got stupid drunk and started asking for ridiculous shit from people close to  me dumping even more budens on them. i did this under the guise of anxiety and with the understandng that i wouldnt remember.  i dont think that the shit ive asked from my friends or family was too bad but, it extended to my coworkers.  now, they all know that im a ridiculous drunk. i …

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51

So Tired…

December 31st, 2011by sneezy66

I can’t begin to explain how tired I am of everything.  Tired of being a failure, tired of the loneliness, tired of feeling like an alien that doesn’t belong anywhere, tired of not having any money, tired of putting on a brave face, tired of my shitty family, tired of having “trusted” friends stabbing me in the back, tired of hurting, tired of being hurt, tired of the sadness, tired of missing the only man I ever loved, tired of having everything go wrong, tired of the holidays … most of all, I’m tired of living.

I know people keep saying that tomorrow is the start …

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3

From Your Future ….

December 31st, 2011by adastra

As I am now “literally” in the & from the future, I wish everyone here, young & old(er) a somewhat happy New Year, and I genuinely hope/want/desire that you all have a “better” (not perfect, it doesnt exist) year ahead.

Will there be so so days or problems? Off course there will be not so good days & problems. Thats normal. That is life.

Staying positive is really like eating. If you don’t do it regularly enough, your entire health suffers.

Can I make a suggestion to everyone, whether you are sick or not? Use google for good ~ Go Google “inspirational quotes” (or people who have overcome …

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11

Finally dug the last foot of a grave

December 31st, 2011by Stacey Corbin

Ya know, I have had many, many, many, suicides this past month or so. Three. They all never showed any signs or anything and of course with the subject coming up everywhere i look now that this has happened it has reopened my deep feelings of wanting to do it however i stuck in there because it was the holidays.
Today i found out my parents are getting divorced. out of the whole year it had to be this month with all my friends’ suicides. like seriously. this is tearing me apart but i put on a brave face and listen to both of them …

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8

Jan 3 or 4

December 31st, 2011by vthrohrt

I’m a 22 year old engaged mother of one. My family takes care of my son and I entirely. I own a home, a car, I have food in the fridge and the lights are on.

I have failed at everything I’ve ever tried. I only graduated HS because my dad put me in a lock down boarding school where I didnt have a choice other than to graduate. I recently got kicked out of a school I’d been working 3 years to get into due to my anxiety/having to take medication for said anxiety.

I cant keep my house clean, I cant keep my kid happy, …

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4

The Calling

December 31st, 2011by cj

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5

2012…

December 31st, 2011by WristSlitz

Starting this Year January 29th, I became suicidal. And ever since, ive been a freak. I’m really tired of it and 2011 was the worst year of my life.

I don’t want to live past today. No one loves me, no one cares that I’m struggling and my mom doesn’t even show compassion at the fact that I’m depressed. Yesterday, my grandma found my cutting knife in my purse. My mom called me forever retarded and didn’t even take the time to realize I had been cutting myself and was struggling. I have the worst family ever.

I am probably going to kill myself tonight. Have …

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4

I wish

December 31st, 2011by kellylynn

I wish I would disappear .. Never again to return. All I wanna do is die.. I have to admit yes I have tried to kill myself several times, bit failed… I just need help:((

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6

Suicide

December 31st, 2011by kellylynn

Suicide is all I think about… I just hate my life

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2

fuck the world. no turnin back this time!

December 31st, 2011by cws971

within the next few days I’m gonna end it… I lost all ambition in life. nothing makes me happy any more… sick of living like this with social anxiety ‘ I’m always fucking nervous I can’t ever enjoy my time. January 6th is when I gotta do 2 months in jail. fuck that ain’t going back there to suffer even more. fuck the world. my time has come.

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5

I Hate Myself..

December 31st, 2011by Silent Screamer

I hate myself so fucking much.

It’s quite hard.. to explain how much I hate the way I am.

And I hate my gorgeous, skinny, perfect friends too for saying that they are ugly.

Shut the fuck up.

I would honestly kill to look like them.

I am never happy with myself.

I can’t do anything right.

I’m ugly.

Fat.

Stupid.

Worthless.

Disgusting.

I just hate it.

Why was I given this body.

Why?

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3

I Miss It..

December 31st, 2011by Silent Screamer

I miss the cutting so much.

 

It’s odd.

 

For a while.. I didn’t think about it.

 

I didn’t think about anything.

 

I was numb. But now..

 

It’s like a need.

 

I have anxiety attacks now.

 

I will start crying.

 

I need cutting.

 

Not burning.. nothing else.

 

Just cutting.

 

But I just can’t get a fucking blade.

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3

Wilting violet wants to die

December 31st, 2011by violentviolet

Hello all, first apologizies for any typos, as am writing on my ipod. Anyway, well, I guess what brought me to this site is how sad and hopeless i feel. I’ve been struggling with depression since the age of 5; that was when I first had suicidal thoughts. My parents neglected meto the point of abandonment. After my father severely abused me, my mom and siblings we fled to my grandmother’s care. We were better but still faced poverty, hunger and chaos; along with my grandma lived my gangbanger cousin who brought drugs, sex and violence into our home and a schitzophrenic uncle who was …

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4

new year resolutions

December 31st, 2011by air.93

-stop smoking

-lose weight

-work on self esteem

-work on social anxiety

-stop cutting

anyone else?

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