a struggle with growing apathy .. to have little concern for too many things .. to live life in autopilot mode, doing things because you’re used or expected to and rarely because you desire to .. your soul is disconnected from this 3D reality, you have a wandering mind and your body is what keeps you trapped in a world you don’t want to be a part of
I’ve been living this way for 4+ years and I’m truly fed up with being half a zombie half a robot .. I’ve done a lot of introspection to find out I’m only interested in two things: total freedom and truth .. in my opinion, those can only be experienced when you’re out of this world
my one and last goal will be to leave somewhere before February 2013 .. until then, I’ll be doing my best to erase what’s left of my ego, because ego cannot digest the idea of its own death and would trick me into staying here
I don’t hate life itself nor this planet .. I believe life on here could be a more stimulating experience if I wasn’t part of the human species .. I’ve grown to dislike life as a human being, the main reason being the lack of ‘humanity’ .. humans are the virus of this planet and I know I’ll only find peace when I’m no longer part of the problem (excuse the misanthropic tone)
even if the behavior of us ‘modern’ men could all be explained by science, I’d have to ask this: have you heard of animals killing other animals if they aren’t hungry nor aware of some direct/indirect threat ? (I’m not an expert on the question, I’d really like to know)
I was watching some vids on snakes the other day and learned a python and green mamba won’t kill their usual prey if they aren’t hunting. I’m tempted to believe those predators have more respect for life than the average human
anyway … 2013 baby !