Death is Always On My Mind…

Afraid to die

Yes

But this life isn’t for me

No body really cares

My family wants the best for me

But the same time they just over protect me from everything

Always wanting me to be their baby

But always wanting me to have my own life

How am I supposed to have my own life when they keep me away

The more we fight

The more I lost track of time

I messed up so much

The more I mess up

The more bitter I turned

The more arguements and fights

The more I day dream about the what if’s

I lose

Now there’s no where to go

Trapped on this lonely broken path

More afraid than ever

People say I am lucky

But how

Where’s the luck now

I was too bitter

I was too stubborn to listen to anyone

Too blinded by the past

I ran away from everything

I ran away from everyone

Because I was just too afraid

Now that I am back

I can make my own deciosions

But I can’t fix the old choices

Everyone despise me now

They truly hate me and the mistakes that I have made

It’s too late

They’ve moved on

As I think about my mistakes

I should just end my life now

I know

And understand now

That I have beeen a coward all my life

Every mistake is a crime

And I belong in the pits of hell

It is my fault anyways

I was too immature

Too afraid to be who I wanted to be

Just wanted to be noticed

Just wanted to be treated the same like everyone else

Even if it took a fight

But since I have failed

I guess I just can’t anymore

I’m stupid for coming back

Should just leave

And never look back

Even if I wanted too

This time I should leave

And never come back