1

incoherent thoughts somehow forming sentences

September 30th, 2012by holdingOn

some may say that this is a selfish thought- I honestly don’t know- or maybe I just don’t care…

I don’t think that i should have to hide these cuts, or even the scars. I shouldn’t have to lie about my depression, or be pressured to ‘fake it’ through everyday. I shouldn’t have to hide the fact that I finally found something to make the pain go away.
self-mutilation isn’t a problem as long as I control it right? I’ve got a problem & the blade is my solution

I am a selfish bitch- I make life miserable for everyone around me, and I just can’t stop fucking …

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4

Survived…

September 30th, 2012by silent survivor

Well on the 27th i was on my way to school around 8:15am when i was hit by a bus…yes a BUS and i survived, at first it was no biggie thank god it was only turning a corner so it wasn’t going fast enough to kill me…i think? Anyways i got away with a minor head wound, bruising on my foot even though the bus ran over it alittle,no bones were broken and scrapes on my ear where the bus had it me. Everyone’s been telling me how lucky i am to even be alive or to be standing and stuff and at first …

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16

Good Night

September 30th, 2012by Black Swan

So I’ll be going under the knife again for what could be the 10th time in my life now? The lithium they forced on me at the hospital 6 months ago ruined the last surgery I had done and since I will soon have to head back to New York to fulfill my miserable dead end destiny, I have to shape up for it. I really wish I died in that operating table but I know I won’t be that lucky. Good night to all of you out there.

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3

no reason

September 30th, 2012by lamarcell

knife
normal people me
a cutting tool …

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1

Two roads

September 30th, 2012by pangea

Two different roads
One goes to my head
another is attatched to my heart.
A stomach screaming to be fed
I am being ripped apart
By eyes gazing in the mirror
Shedding salt watered hate.
a disorder covering fear
Not dealing with my fate.
The road to my head
Is traveled all to well
By knowledge false beliefs lead
My mind is a constant hell.
The one that connects the heart
Is a journey for few brave friends.
Loving many who will never start.
Hiding where the forbidden road ends.
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4

dying inside

September 30th, 2012by katiebear12

im dying inside… everyday in the pain i face… but its not enough to kill me… i’ve tried but i can never do it and i scare myself so much trying to hold on to what i have… my problem isn’t that im not loved because i know i am… i couldn’t stand causing someone to go through the pain i am… but yet i cling to that one option and i don’t want to do it… but its my only way out now

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1

I’m not a whore, treat me with respect.

September 30th, 2012by Nephilim_Sancti

This guy says that he’s liked me since high school, but all he ever wants to talk about is sex… nothing else, just sex and how he thinks he’s ugly. He talks to me like I’m a whore. I’m sorry but I require a lot more respect than that. We’re supposed to be “friends” but he deleted me from xbox live after I weighlayed him with my what-for cause I’m finally not putting up with shit anymore. He’s made no effort to want to hang out- I guess he just wants to talk to me like that over the xbox and nothing more. We live …

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3

I Can Never Satisfy

September 30th, 2012by Jake

No matter how much I try with my parents, my teachers, my friends, it never adds up, I can never satisfy anyone. Nothing I do is ever right. Even if I do do something right it is still wrong! I’ve had numerous failed attempts against my life and just quit trying after that. But every time my parents start up about my schoolwork I want to go back for another try. The only time I feel clm and relaxed is when I’m playing a game or doing something outside with my imagination (no, not masturbating). I’m sitting there all calm just playing my video game …

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4

Give me a reason to live

September 30th, 2012by eplurubusunum

-*-

My clock is ticking already.  My mum’s abuse is finally too much.  It’s been too much, I’ve just been clinging to the hope that it’ll all go away. But it’s not. Hopefully by tomorrow I won’t be here to bug anyone with my sh*t anymore.  No one will have to deal with me. Not you guys, not the people who usually have to deal with it. I’ll be gone. I wish I’d come here sooner. Maybe I’d be stronger than I am.

-*-

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2

december 3rd….

September 30th, 2012by Angel

so i have a doctors appointment for my depression on December 3rd….. that date runs through my mind everyday like its my birthday or something.. i think th appointment is just so the doctor can refer me to another doctor which is gonna be really disappointing. i used to be able to get through some days but now everyday is hard to get through. i have trouble keeping myself from going over board and my nights are worse. i feel anxsious for some reason and restless..i cant sleep at night until it gets real late and then im exhausted for school in the morning. i …

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5

I want to kill myself.

September 30th, 2012by Itisover

Since I was 9/10 years old, I’ve been having thoughts of suicide. I won’t go into detail, but I will tell you that I have had a terrible life so far. I can’t think of a single moment where I was truely happy. I learned to live with thoughts of suicide and depression, but lately it’s taking me over. I really don’t see the point in living anymore, I don’t care about anyone or anything. I have just started college, but I know I am going to fail (for the second time). I am not prepared for anything, and I refuse to do so in …

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3

Roller Coaster Life

September 30th, 2012by jhvtfcjkhjm nvjh

Every re occurring thought.

Every night, before I fall asleep.

When my mind is racing.

I go over my whole day.

I smile, I frown.

Some good days, some bad days.

Today.

Today was just a big mixture.

Like a roller coaster.

It’s going all over the place.

Big hills, little hills, fast turns, slow turns, big jumps, little jumps, upside down turns..

It’s a thrill to be in this life.

My day to day life is a roller coaster.

My Bi-polar disorder, is like a roller coaster.

I need to

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1

WHY

September 30th, 2012by marina-sol333

Even though my friends say its ok ,tha ti am the way i AM .I cant take it anymore .I have thought of ending it but when i think of dying a shiver comes over my shoulder and tears come to my eyes even thought my ”stupid problems” may not seem like much these small things greatly affect me .My family even my freinds see my as a happy go lucky person but im not like that its just a cover for them not to thik ima freak ,i wonder how long i can keep it up .

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1

I don’t care how much I’m posting…

September 30th, 2012by Abiron

Always seem to be leaving out information. Always seeming to be daydreaming about how gorgeous and how less confusing I’d be if depression, ADHD, aspergers, Bi-polar, and others weren’t knocking on my door each and every time to fuck around. Damn it…that one little light of hope man..I can feel that happiness when I daydream…only to look back in reality and feeling depression swinging right back into my soul again, preventing me from feeling anything…

It’s right there man…that little happiness is still there…Then why the fuck am I so depressed!? It pisses me off! It pisses me off that for a second I can see …

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5

The misadventures of Nate…

September 30th, 2012by RogueShadow1281

He walked, rather swiftly, quiet as a mouse, across dark alleyways, through long, narrow tunnles, and past as few people as possible. As he walked, he kept a disguise in case he was discovered by the ones he hid from. These people he hid from wielded hidden knives and loved to sneak behind you and… Surprise!

He opened the front door to his house to find friends and family springing out of their hiding places in a frenzy, as if a lions pride were lunging at their prey to quickly subdue them. He stood there, wide-eyed, until the realization that many people would watch him intently …

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12

Everest

September 30th, 2012by marshalljenkins

I’m here in the present, but I still think of the past.

You’ve left me there for months: seven and a half.

I’ve struggled to get through them, using all of my might,

I’ve ended up on the edge of Everest, and I might jump tonight.

 

If I decide to jump, would you make a move and catch me?

Or would you let me fall, and let the outcome be deadly?

I tried to pick up the pieces, but you just wouldn’t let me.

So I’ll leave them on the floor, since you don’t want to caress me.

 

Will I become a part of the lying and scattered pieces?

Broken like my heart, with …

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4

realization

September 30th, 2012by katiebear12

I felt as if I let go of myself that my whole world would fall apart. I closed my eyes to try to block out my surroundings. An old memory floated to the front of my ming. Soon afterward, i was enveloped in it. I was seven, approaching the eve of my eighth birthday. I was in Chamber 5, my dorm, with my roommate, 219265, and she had thought to make me something, which was against the Protocall. She had said that  she had taken over a month to complete it, under complete secrecy. She handed me a small parcel, which was poorly wrapped with paper and scraps of cloth taken from sheets. I

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1

Help

September 30th, 2012by NikkiC2016

Life is too short
Yet it passes bye
Time is too precious
When you want to die
I don’t know what to say
I don’t know what to do
But I’ve wanted to live
Until this very day

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0

Endless Darkness

September 30th, 2012by Nephilim_Sancti

Mirror Mirror,

Who am I?
To make the unborn angels cry,

I’ll fight the demons,

My war inside.

Cut them down to size.

Ring around the rosies,

A pocket full of lead,

Sprinkle on them ashes,

Of unbaptized dead,

Falling out of nowhere,

Into someplace deep.

Shallow are our souls,

Unable to drink,

Drowning in the darkness,

There’s nowhere left to hide,

Running out of options,

Losing every fight,

Fear is taking over,

Clogging up my mind,

Drifting endless darkness,

Broken sands of time.

Cauterize the wound,

Still it never heals,

Cauterize the soul,

Feels the same as hell.

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2

Wake me from this nightmare

September 30th, 2012by Heartsick1210

ITS AMAZING HOW OME PERSON CAN MAKE YOU FEEL SO ALIVE, BUT WHEN YOU MAKE THE TERRIBLE MISTAKE IVE MADE, THEY LEAVE YOU FOR DEAD. I CANT GIVE MY HEART TO ANYONE ELSE, SHE STILL HAS MINE. ITS BEEN SIX LONG MONTHS SINCE I WAS HER’S AND SHE WAS MINE. I HAVE BEEN MISERABLE EVERY SINGLE DAY SINCE I LOST HER. I JUST DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE. DEATH SEEMS LIKE MY ONLY OPTION. THIS PAIN IS JUST WAY TOO INTENSE TO BARE. I JUST WISH THINGS WERE DIFFERENT, I REALLY DO. I STILL LOVE HER, BUT SHE CAN NEVER LOVE ME BACK. I …

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