I’m just so tired of suffering. The emotional pain sucks beyond belief and the tears never seem to subside. I’m the same age my father was he took his own life; it was devastating to me as a thirteen-year-old child.
And now I grapple with my emotional pain, wishing I could end it all, but not wanting to inflict the same distress, misunderstanding of love, and rejection onto my own son that my father’s suicide encompassed me with.
Fuck. Nothing is easy. I can’t even check out smoothly or with ease. Just sucks.