Am I the only one?

January 17th, 2014 by Kinnaree

Seriously, around 85% of the people I know are in a relationship. How come I seem to find no one? Where is my special person? I’m starting to believe love is the biggest lie/trap. Really. I’m 21 and I never did anything with a guy! Worse thing is, I hate boasting, but everyone says that I’m pretty, that I have potential blah blah blah but in the end who’s single? Me! Okay, I know that’s not so bad (although I have plenty other problems), but I improved, I’m not especially shy, I’m a bit introverted that’s right, but I’m approchable. I hate when people boast about their relationships and sex, it makes me want to punch them in the face cause they know very well I’m still single!  I think I’m going to die with my 36 cats, childless and old, then I’d realize I’ve wasted my youth for nothing… Great. Gosh, even my younger cousin got a boyfriend. I really love her and all but I used to never be jealous before and now I’m so dead jealous that I need to stay in bed because I have rage outbursts! I feel like I became a monster of jealousy. What about you, single people? I know this topic isn’t relevant for a suicide option, actually not at all, but do you feel bad being the third wheel too?

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11 Responses to “Am I the only one?”

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  1. You have 36 cats? lol

    Don’t come across as needy. Guys (the better ones) don’t like it anymore than girls like it of guys. Maybe you aren’t happy with yourself? I dunno. It could be, based on what you posted here.

    But, it sounds like you are just lonely, which I can understand. My wife of 14 years left me, got thrown into the world of dating again. I thought I would never have to again, after all, marriage is/was forever (my parents were married nearly 50 years before dad died).

    I can tell you as a guy, I like both decent looks (at least) and a great personality). Personality matters me to me. If you have the personality, you will find the relationship.

    I know 99 percent of guys out there only want a woman for sex nowadays. I’m the percent who looks deeper than that, but I am a sex maniac too. lol

    Just be yourself. Fake nothing. Don’t lie, and don’t cheat on your boyfriend when you get one.

    As a guy, I can tell you those are all deal breakers, and very quickly.

    My wife used her iPhone and had a list of guys she would both talk to and have sex with.

  2. I’m an introvert too… Sometimes our problem is being too smart and people sometimes get a little unnerved by that. Try posting a profile on a dating site and meet some people for coffee. Screen ‘em good! Don’t settle! You deserve better than that.

  3. 21 is young dear. Let time do its work. I had the same fears at this age, but things move so very quickly when we’re young. You have plenty of possibilities to meet new people. You have new class mates, you change jobs, and everything. When you get older, you’re stuck at one place, one job, one circle of friends (and they all start to have children so you kinda lose them) There, if you have nobody, it’s hard to create opportunities to meet someone.

    Be patient, and try to enjoy your youth and your friends. Finding a partner is only one aspect of life and it doesn’t define who you are.

    And even if you end up with 36 cats ;) well they will love you for sure !

  4. not that my opinion is worth something, but I think it’s because you exausted your social network. From my own experiance it’s all about getting to meet new people. Eventually you will find someone that will gravitate towards you, wether you’ll like him or not is an entirely different thing ofcourse.

    Coming from an rather introvert guy I can tell you that you are noticed for sure, but maybe just by introvert guys. I surely don’t have the courage to walk up to a girl and start chatting her up. I mean, the only relationship I ever had started on this very website..

    and I do understand not being able to get a relationship while everybody around you has one is a pain, not a wee little pain, but a huge aching hole. Be strong hun :)

  5. Being different attracts loneliness. Be confident in your intelligence and the results will come. Let the time decide!
    There s plenty of time to ‘wait’ for the right one. Let the Universe work for you.

  6. I think this topic IS a good one as far as suicide goes. So many people deal with loneliness as the main cause of their suicidal thoughts. Myself included. I’m not bad looking at at all but I’m 26 and I’ve had a whopping two relationships. It usually takes 2 years to come across someone who is even the slightest bit interested.

    So… I feel your pain and I bet I could tell you a hundred things everyone else tells you on the topic… so I’ll skip it.

    ^ravanys is right, lots of introverted guys will think you’re so beautiful that they’ll convince themselves instantly that they are destined for failure if they talk to you. So… fortune favors the bold my friend. Go get em’

    Good luck out there.

  7. No, I don’t think you are the only one, as seen from these replies :P. I too have similar feelings and that’s more or less why I ended up to this website D;. I wouldn’t consider myself even that introverted, but eventually loneliness can start devouring your self esteem, which will have the same effect. Fortunately (for me xD) many of my friends are singles as well.

  8. “I think I’m going to die with my 36 cats, childless and old, then I’d realize I’ve wasted my youth for nothing… Great.”
    Yea pretty much this. This is essentially the thought that just makes me say “no” with a smile: no way am I gonna let that happen, rather die young than grow old alone without a friend (or even a cause).
    Not that spending most of the live without a partner or even alone was necessarily so bad for everyone. Some people can be okay with it. But some can’t, I guess. Depends on personality and such.
    Oh, I’m sure this is more than suitable topic to a suicide website.

    (This place needs an edit button.)

  9. I’m 34. I would give my left arm to find a girlfriend again. I want to die. A shame we can’t meet

  10. “Don’t come across as needy. Guys (the better ones) don’t like it ”

    Are you kidding me?? Only because some guys who represent societies fucked up ideals don’t like girls to be needy doesn’t mean these guys are the “better ones”. Being self-confident and extrovert and going to lots of parties neither makes you a better lover nor a better human being. Shitty ideals like this and people who spread these ideals are the reasons why girls don’t talk to introvert guys like me. I have NO PROBLEM at all with girls being needy. Fuck this, I’m outa here

  11. I’m in the exact same situation as you, and am not much younger either. I’ve never even been on a date, just stood up on one. I often feel unwanted, and I also wonder what’s the deal since I’m kind of pretty and try to be approachable. Definitely has not helped my self-esteem in the slightest. I don’t ever plan on getting married, but I don’t want to die a virgin :(

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