I didn’t successfully attempt my suicide last night. I had my beers and accidentally got too drunk, threw up, and fell asleep. I have all of the basic materials to complete my task. A bag and rope for restraint, is what its come down too. I’ve tried so many methods in the past that I clearly failed at. I’m so disappointed that I’m even writing this now and not just murdering myself.
I just need the sheer willpower to withstand the agony involved with asphyxiation. I’ll have it soon..
4 comments
May I ask how you attempted it last night?
I didn’t get around to attempting because of my drinking, but when I do it I will be using a good ole’ fashioned plastic bag and hand restraints. It’s certainly less painful than hanging, which I’ve tried. And pills is something that is painful and doesn’t work for me at all. Every time I take pills, I hallucinate, its horrible. I even went all the way to San Francisco to jump off the bridge, but couldn’t bring myself to take the leap. I’ve always wanted to simply die in my bed and the method I’ve chosen seems to be the perfect solution.
Suicide takes a great deal of courage.
Sometimes it is the right thing to do.
But not always.
I’m struggling with this issue, I’m not any smarter or better than you are. I have lived on the street before.
Your post today shows me that you know there are no good methods.
The post you wrote yesterday shows you are intelligent. You are not among the mound dwellers in this world which is full of such creatures. If no one else will help you–and often that is really the truth–then you may get stuck with having to go it alone. I don’t know that it’s easier or harder at any particular life stage. It was hard in my 10s and 20s, and still hard 30 years later. A lot of fellas who read this website would be happy to see what you have to say tomorrow. It’s only a computer screen. But people here sometimes notice when a posting source vanishes, and wonder if that person is still alive.
Please read my reply to your closet post about the girl you’ll never have the chance to meet.