I can’t handle it anymore, i just want to end my life, I’m a mess, and I’m a mean person with everyone I love.
My dad just die in 2011, and it hits me so hard, and I was so angry, because he never was there for me, even after all, I loved him, he’s my dad and I just wanted him with me to protect me.
I almost commit suicide because of that, and it didn’t happen because I was afraid, I’m still afraid.
After three years, now my mom has a boyfriend and he’s a kind person, he has two daughters, the younger one is so cute, she has five and I love her like my little sister, but the older one… I just hate her, she’s the most fakest person I’ve ever meet, and my mom likes her and prefers her, like he was the daughter she always wanted.
I know I’m a fucking mess, but nobody give a fuck about me, I’m always keeping my feelings for myself, I cried alone, I’m always alone, and my mom just yelled at me and make comparisons between that girl and me. I can’t be her, I don’t want to be a disgusting person like her, I wish she dies, but I prefer kill myself it would be more easy, nobody will miss me after all.
I was afraid of killing myself, but now, I’m not afraid anymore.