School is like literally stressing me out and making me feel alone and depressed. I’m not gonna graduate High School, im about a semester behind, my counselor said it already, maybe there is hope for me to graduate, she said, maybe. I’m wasn’t born in the U.S. and I got all the permits from the Dream Act and if I don’t graduate, then they’ll strip them away and throw me back to the country I was born in, although, I was born in Mexico, The U.S. is my home, I was raised here, I came here when I was 4, im 16 now (17 in less than 2 months). My depression and social anxiety makes it hard for me to talk to anyone or even talk in class. I avoid people and when they talk to me, I turn red and I start sweating. I see everyone succeeding and socializing, while I’m lonely and failing. This is supposed to be the easiest part of life, but why is it so damn hard? I feel like I should just end it because I’m struggling in life and I know for sure I will later. I’m not meant for this world, im not fit emotionally or physically.
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
5 comments
Ah, Jumper, it’s been some time. Or maybe hasn’t. I’ve been off and on for the past month so I may just as well of missed you. But, onto my comments main purpose…
When I transferred to my most recent high school, I was technically a sophomore, BUT, when I was expelled midway through my freshman year at my former high school, I had passed ONE semester of ONE class. So during my sophomore year, I had to take both freshman and sophomore classes and had to go to summer school before and after that year to be just behind for my junior year. Now, my own problems led to my eventual dropping out of school a few months later, but my point is, you CAN graduate.
I didn’t have much of a social life at my most previous high school, they were a bunch of snobbish county kids, but I still made it a year and a half. You can make it a semester.
Also, I don’t understand how you can be deported if you don’t graduate. If your family’s still here, then that shouldn’t be possible.
High school isn’t the easiest part of life! You learn how cruel others can be. Later in life they can still be cruel, but at least you learn to expect it 🙂
I am also living in a country where I was not born, but I consider my home. It is really hard, getting visas and fighting to stay in the country that you love and where you feel you belong. I can totally relate.
I came here on a working visa with plans to stay forever. After 4 years my company didn’t renew my work contract, and I was going to lose my working visa soon. I was terrified. I did NOT want to go back to my country of birth. No matter what.
But because I was married to a citizen of that country I could apply for a spousal visa, which let me do any job without restrictions. I was so happy I could stay.
But for years before that I worked for a corrupt company and did a lot of unethical things because I “had” to in order to keep my job and keep my visa. It really weighed heavily on my conscious. Since leaving that company I vowed to always stick to my morals and beliefs.
High school can be really hard, but if you get through it, everything changes after. You go new places and meet new people and it just gets better.
P.S.
(If your family are naturalized U.S. citizens then you should be able to get a visa as a “Child of a U.S. National”, which means you won’t be deported if you don’t graduate.
But if they aren’t U.S. citizens then it’s tougher. Still, there may be other options to get a visa to stay in the U.S.)
conscience
Brian Wilson of the Beach Boys said “I’m not made for this world” just as he descended into madness. I get their talent but they’re not my music but what he said resonates with me.