The leaves are blowing past my window; each of them a tiny leap of faith off the tree to their golden death below. A beautiful suicide…
Unlike me.
I made the leap off the tree. I tried my best to fall to the ground, graceful and sweet… But I got scared. I turned around and held on again.
A life spent living for death, but too afraid to die.
I wonder if I’ll ever be able to fall to the ground or if I’ll just rot away on the limb…
3 comments
I read one of your previous posts in which you explained your family story. It’s pretty clear how rough things are for you at the moment. The comment left below that post told you to stay strong. Sometimes you have to find the strength inside you. Things won’t always be like this. One day, you’ll have the ability to leave this situation and begin your own life. Ending your life isn’t the answer. You’ll have your own future with its own accomplishments. Try not to forget that when things are stressful.
From your previous post:
“They’re all waiting for the next time I quit a job, or can’t make rent, or attempt another suicide. Its not actually abot me – they’re just making sure to keep that little black sheep off to the side and in order with their perfectness.”
In the end, what really matters is YOU. There will always be people in your life who get in the way, unfairly critique you, or set you up for failure. The world is full of people like that. Don’t let them de-rail you. Do your best to succeed… That’s all that anybody can ask of you. WHEN (not if) you succeed, that will be the best way to demonstrate how you overcame their obnoxiousness. You can succeed… if you give yourself a chance.
if we hate this life so much why is it so hard to jump over? its just the unknown