I had a strange and morbid fascination the other night concerning a documentary I watched a few years ago…called “The Bridge” and it chronicles suicides from the Golden Gate Bridge. It’s hard to watch; haunting; very sad. What really spoke to me was the story of Kevin Hines, who actually survived the jump. Once he leaped, he was suddenly struck with the realization that he wanted to LIVE and changed his mind mid-air. And that’s what really haunts me…what if once you pull the trigger, or hoist the rope or leap off…what if in that very moment you decide that you don’t want to die after all?? Will you be able to stop or come back? Even worse, what if you just do some serious permanent damage? I recall the story my paraplegic friend told me while he was in rehab; of a girl who didn’t want to live without the use of her legs and stuck a gun in her mouth. Only, she didn’t aim correctly and now she is a quadriplegic and unable to speak. Is the tragedy of life greater truly greater than the tragedy of the unknown?
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I guess that’s what keeps people in the game of life. Not knowing.
I remember that documentary. The guy shattered his whole body. Yeah, that’s the scary thing…not dying. There are things that most likely will kill a person, but there is always that chance where you didn’t think it could get any worse, but it does.
The Bridge is such a great documentary. My favorite was Gene because he jumped with such conviction, you know death is exactly what he wanted. But you’re right. Anyone who has second thoughts is in for a heap of trouble.
I’m really curious to know if Kevin Hines is still around embracing life. To me, being suicidal (to the point of jumping off a frickin bridge) never goes away. It may go into remission for a while, but it’s always there hanging over your shoulder ready to take hold the first chance it gets.
Over the years I’ve had a few powerful “I WANT TO LIVE” moments, even as recently as last week. But those feelings never really take root. Or rather, the “I WANT TO DIE” moments are so much more powerful and lasting.
Gene hesitated for a few hours before jumping. They have surveillance cameras and suicide hot-line phones on the bridge. The cameras captured Gene’s image pacing, peering over the edge, and taking pensive steps forwards and backwards before he actually leapt.
His jump was spectacular. If I remember correctly, he did a backflip off the railing. The other part I remember about that documentary is the splash that a human body makes from plunging into water from such great heights.
That was a great show.
Kevin Hines is very much alive and engaged in suicide prevention. He has been instrumental in getting the project to build a suicide barrier on the bridge started. His autobiography is called “Cracked, Not Broken”
Not sure if people have a last second conversion and decide they want to live once they jump. I think they might’ve realized it’s not a reliable method for suicide and want to try something better. But it’d be pretty retarded if jumping off the bridge made them realize life is worth living. Usually in most cases, it’s a sober, well-thought out decision for most people who want to end their lives.
I couldn’t imagine anything worse than the story of the girl you mentioned who became a quadriplegic…it’s almost like a sick, evil joke. But the worst of it is that they saved her life, rather than recognize she wanted to end it and help her. That’s the real tragedy and barbarity of our backwards civilization. We mercy-kill our pets to save them from suffering, yet we refuse to accept that humans suffer as much and should be allowed to end their lives.
This is also a worry for me-something going wrong if/when I decide to commit suicide. I’m planning to do it by inert gas, but I’ve heard of people getting gas embolisms which leave you paralyzed or comatose or worse. Our health institutions do have the best methods, but thanks to religious scumbags creating our laws, doctors are not allowed to euthanize people.
I used to plan on going by jumping too, and this was one my worse fears: to actually survive, and be paralysed or worse. And live to see my family suffer even more than they already do.
I had a relative, many many years ago before it was made illegal, he drank weed killer to kill himself. Sadly it took a week for him to die and it was a long drawn out agonising death.
He changed his mind after he took it, decided he wanted to live after all but there was no coming back from it, no second chance. Doctors told him he was going to die, they couldn’t save him, there was no antidote. They were helpless to save him and he knew it.
Why do you guys watch that shit? It’s like you’re already suicidal enough. Hate watching real death.
It’s not so bad. I look in the mirror and see death every day.