My first time here

You dont say your age or how long you guys were together or why you broke up or why your family wont speak to you. Those are things you should look at. Of course, Im not saying it’s you who is the problem. It’s usually never that simple. But you have to manage yourself. You cannot control what and how others do whatever,,, but you can learn to control how you respond.

I can relate to your post so well. I was always very emotionally needy from a young age.
First gf at 16, I was so controlling and insecure. I didnt know where this insanity came from, only that I was its victim. I couldnt be without a girlfriend, or I just felt incomplete. I also couldnt move beyond being bf/gf w/someone and living together as such.
Betrayal of any kind, by a girl, was so painful it was disproportionately so. How we feel in this regard usually goes back to our early childhood. I know that’s no consolation right now but it does get better.

It took me 5 years,, (it wont take you five.. right now u’r in shock) to be able to be on my own and satisfied without needing anyone. Now I feel pretty liberated, but it sure as hell wasnt easy. People give us something, but there is also a big price attached in terms of loss of self.
That is why it is best to really know oneself first. We often confuse emotional need and desire, with love.
Losing someone is not easy but it does have solutions. It’s a kind of death actually, so there is a mourning period. Try ur best to be good to yourself by not judging your self worth through the eyes of other people. Keep busy. Try and stay positive.
Believe me, I had this the worst. Ik now this doesnt help right now,, but with time it can if you apply it and not identify with what you feel. (we are not what we feel Not the joy or the misery.. those are temporary states that arise in conspicuousness.

I had a girlfriend for 5 years and she left suddenly,, tbh, by that time, I didnt even really want to be with her.. Sex was about the best thing we had going and I had lost interest in even that. Still, when she left, (without a word, to be with someone else, and I dont blame her),, the ‘betrayal’ was absolutely f’g devastating, seriously,, like the worst kind of PTSD that would never go away, for years, on a yo-yo. Insane. I wanted to die. Most people are probably not this f’d up, but I was and Im sure I still have plenty of issues.

When we feel things that strongly there are almost always underlying issues. Not to play armchair psychologist, but for me,, it had to do with emotional abandonment as a child. Even if our parents are present (mine really were not), but even if they are, if they arent emotionally available, we often grow up very emotionally unstable and needy. If he doesnt want to be with you, living well is the best revenge. I promise you, it will get better. You most certainly have other options.. You have the option to pursue your own well-being and independence.

This is true for most of us: ‘The capacity to be alone is the capacity to love. It may look paradoxical to you, but it is not. It is an existential truth: only those people who are capable of being alone are capable of love, of sharing, of going into the deepest core of the other person without possessing the other, without becoming dependent on the other, without reducing the other to a thing, and becoming addicted to the other. ‘ -Osho