A beautiful moment before the end

Over the weekend I had one of the most beautiful moments of my life. I can’t help but love him even though he won’t be mine. He admitted to being superficial. But I ended up getting to rub him down with a full body massage. And it was relaxing, in the sense that, it’s a moment I’ve always dreamed of, giving all of my attention to the one I love, in a romantic way. Only thing I couldn’t do is follow it up with kisses, since we’re not at that level. I’m afraid I’ll never see him now that something he’s committed to doing has changed their times and dates to weekends, that means I don’t get to spend my weekends with him anymore. I’m homeless as you may know if you’ve been following. There’s not shit I can do to get a place to live. I’m afraid I’ll be fired because I’m obviously too tired and groggy to work since I never get to sleep. I feel horrible, physically, from lack of sleep already and it’s only the first night this week, as I have to stay awake 24hrs a day all through the work week. I’m Soooo tired and all I want is to have my dream guy close to me.