Hanging in suspense

I hate myself.

I think I’m falling in love with a very close friend, who doesn’t love me back, naturally. But she doesn’t know it.
At the same time, I’ve been sort of in love with my best friend, who, of course, doesn’t love me back in that way. But she doesn’t know it either. She is in love with a guy who also is in love with her. But he’s an idiot.
Still, he knows… I’ve never talked to him ever, but somehow he knew instantly that I’m in love with the 2 other girls I mentioned. I don’t know how. He just knew it immediately by looking. The 2 girls didn’t believe him; they said that’s the way I treat them normally. I’m glad they don’t know it, because everything would be ruined.

I hate myself for loving people who don’t love me back the same way I do.
I don’t know, I need someone.