It’s been a year since a delightfully happy friend of mine changed completely, she was so religious, extremely cheerful, always helping others, and then! God chose her to fuck her life, why her? Is that even fair that the only life she’s living is ruined? Suddenly she suffered from depression that she can barely smile, she lost weight, she has become a mess, always stray, a whole new fucked up person, it really hurts watching this awful transformation, my heart breaks whenever I see her family, we tried to help in every single way, we never figured out the reason, I tried everything, but I end up feeling desperately useless, and now I can’t help but asking “why?” every day, why her? How and why did god wanted/was able to transform a very pure soul into a broken-hearted one?, she absolutely didn’t deserve it, I mean she was even religious! Like if it was about sins it should’ve been me, I’d deserve to be suffering more than her, at least not her, I’m so disappointed in god, and I no longer believe in justice of god.
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Hey,
I’m not a religious person by any means, and I’m not sure if I really believe in some sort of god (well, I actually don’t but “I’m not sure” is my catchprhase), but you clearly do… so I decided to share the little things I know.
A couple years ago I decided I needed to find answers to my spiritual questions. I was always in and out of churches, etc. I used to ask myself “why does god allow suffering?”
I have a small notebook full of bible verses and the like. Maybe these verses can help you somehow: Job 34:10 says that God never acts wickedly. 1 John 5:19 says that the world is in the power of the “wicked one” (Satan). That, to me, means that this world is injust because it simply doesn’t belong to god anymore. I know you can find more verses to back up this theory, sorry for not knowing more.
Also, Ecclesiastes 9:11 simply says that time and unexpected events happen to every single one of us, so that would be another reason why such a good person is suffering.
Keep it in mind you never said you believe in the bible, so I don’t know if my comment will be relevant at all. If you do, maybe you should look for answers reading the bible itself. People always criticise the bible saying it is a violent book (it is…) but every Christian should read it.
I’ve always wanted to have some kind of faith. I’ve always admited that in people, but no matter what I do, I’m faithless. I guess I can’t develop much faith in the “unseen” anymore. I admire people who can get past those barriers and have hope somehow. Not being too sure if your god is good, or exists, or if he’s really righteous is good… You go look for answers, and if you find them, you make your faith stronger. If you don’t, well, you can find answers in a different place and maybe find new god(s) or give up on theism for once and for all.
I’ve looked for answers everywhere. If you really believe in your god, maybe you will get answers eventually. Others would tell you that god is “testing” your friend. I don’t really know, but hope you find the answers you need. It’s hard to watch our friends suffer and feel like we can’t do anything to help them.
Peace.
I’m trying hard not to lose faith, or become an atheist, because it’ll cause lack of hope/motivation, but looks like it already happened and i’m denying it, and pretending I still believe, however, yeah i got your point, according to my religion its a test and stuff but, DOES SHE REALLY DESERVE IT? I guess words are easy to say, but ok yeah he’s testing her by fucking up her life? I can’t convince myself saying “god knows what he’s doing” no, please, just stop, I’m so mad at the world, fate, life, and how everything went.
Anyway, thank you for your time i’m so honored <3
Sometimes people have to lose their way before they can find a better one. More religiously oriented people would say God constantly tests us and it is a good thing; but I don’t give that much credence. Maybe this isn’t about her but about you; can you still be supportive to someone that has changed so radically? Maybe this is just the tip of the iceberg; there is something horrible inside her and it needs to come out.
Listen to her.
I really tried everything and i’m too tired to tell details about it, but seems like she literally lost a part of her mind, she has become weird, even diagnosed with schizophrenia at first, but right now no one knows, lastly she was diagnosed with clinical depression and took antidepressants for 4 months then she stopped assuming she’s fine and they’re not good for her, her stopping antidepressants messed badly with her brain chemicals way more than before, and now she’s just here, she continues being stray, she skipped an educational year, she shouldve been graduating by the end of this semester.
Definitely sounds like a schizophrenic break. That happened to one of my best friends during his first year in college.
There is nothing you can do except be supportive. You can educate yourself about schizophrenia so you understand what is going on. My heart goes out to you and her.
Oh, by the way, sorry for the long answer lol. And the typos (gotta be fast. I’m at work… hehe)