I’m at hospital and found out i’m pregnant. Will be in here for a while. It is the worst time possible. Don’t know what to do anymore.
blythe_ann
Birthday is approaching and I know I have to go before that. I would’ve liked to have known who will be elected. I am scared to know, almost.
I have to accept that my life has been tragic, very bad cards dealt. I tried very, very hard to make things better. I did. No one can ever blame me for not trying.
I have to let myself go.
Nothing more and cannot cope, will not bounce back in this broken body.
Will be the day.
Would they miss me if I never came back. I hope they forget me soon enough and live happy, long lives full of nature and joy.
I don’t want to leave them. I don’t want to leave him. My deepest sorries.
Please know I do not have any other option.
My wish is that they all will be okay.
And that no one will ever find any physical part of me.
I was not meant for this world.
I’ve tried so hard but it wasn’t in the cards.
You can’t fight fate, you can’t fight your physical clock.
I love you both so very, very much.
Wanted you to go on adventures, rolling hills and grass, butterflies and wildflowers. You deserve that.
I’m really glad I got to see them a few weeks ago. Was amazing. It will be my last. I wish I was well, but I am not, and will never be.
My birthday is coming up, and I know I won’t make it. Would be so hard this year. I cannot bear it, or the coming months. I can’t. I really can’t. Don’t you understand?
Please God, I’ve asked you for help, to make things okay, to let good things happen. Please. I know you don’t exist but I pleaded anyway. I was meant for nothing good on this earth.
So many bad things have happened.
Bad people.
I gave […]