Rants

1

Here we go I guess

October 22nd, 2014by Ayahra

Hi. I’ve never done anything like this before. I never really like talking to people about my suicidal tendencies, mostly because the people I need to share this with and want help from, are the people that don’t want to hear anything about this.

I don’t see a max on the amount of characters permitted, so I guess I’m going to tell you my whole story..

 

 

I was born on the 15th of April, 1994, in Milan, Italy–I am 100% Italian, with both parents being Italian. Apparently, according to my mother, I wasn’t planned.. you see, the thing with my mother is that she likes to blame …

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0

almost…

October 21st, 2014by kateralia

Its days like this I feel almost human, almost visible, almost a part of life. Days like this, although its too early & I’m on a crowded bus, I don’t want to die. I want to live & enjoy life. But I have to remind myself that this is only a fleeting glance. I am cursed, in pain, unlovable, poor & soon to be homeless. & that is not gonna change.

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3

so this is the end i guess

October 21st, 2014by ndt998

Been suffering from asebergers, PTSD, BPD, severe social anxiety and extreme guilt for ages….. my gulit, combined wiith asebergers just made it so i’m broken socially, which furthers the degree of my BPD and loneliness pretty much by the day. my BPD overlaps with asebergers and i just lose it over little things… and everybody thinks i’m insane. i can’t even go outside and walk around because i’m afraid of what people will think. even my own family thinks i’m crazy!!! my mom has locked me up so many times over the littlest shit… and the funny thing is that pretty much everybody agrees that …

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13

soon…

October 21st, 2014by kateralia

My original intention was to comment on someones post – suicide is not selfish. It is only viewed as selfish by those who are angry because you are nolonger there to be used & abused. That is how it will be for me.

In 1 week I will be homeless.  I really feel like I should give up right now. Everything has fallen apart, but replacements are falling into place. My ‘best friend’ whom I live with has replaced me with one of her friends & her 2 little kids. I have lost my sister to the clutches of my mother, so I am no longer …

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16

What is your difficulty setting?

October 20th, 2014by charlieregal

Lets play a game. I am going to comment my difficulty setting and I want you to tell me yours then think of two things that could make it worse.

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4

Couldn’t Sleep

October 20th, 2014by Zed86

Right. So it is 2:38 in the morning, and I couldn’t sleep. I’m up now, and made the mistake of thinking of old loves and old lives, otherwise known as old scars. Voila, here I am. Might as well tell my story. For the sake of being more direct (and not writing a 47 page essay) I will skip over less important times. If I crack too many inane jokes, it is not because I find it funny, but rather because jokes are easier for me to deal with than the feelings.

 

I was diagnosed at 11 with depression. Given anti-depression meds at 11. 11 years …

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2

Something thats been bothering me.

October 19th, 2014by BrokenAngel8

Well I guess this can be considered an update from me, Since there is a up and down part to it. Well this weekend I went on vacation with my boyfriend and his parents It was amazing though there’s something that’s been bugging me in the back of my mind though. Ok well today before we went back home me, my boyfriend and his mom decided to go zip lining it all seemed great until when it came time for me to get the rope connected well after that they have the person go on the scale and get there weight checked.

How the hell was …

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2

Only 12 more days

October 19th, 2014by greyrainbow

I am done. Tired. I’ve tried DBT. I’ve tried & i’m tired. I love Scott!! I can’t tell him that though. I dream about him & wish he was in my life, other than being my therapist who I can’t & cannot appease. So, I’ve decided that death will finally take me, as I’ve always felt it would. You see, I have no friends. I can’t & don’t keep them. This world sucks!!! All you see is hate & killing. People who think they are owed, who don’t shoot for the moon themselves. They just want everything handed to them. So, my Suicide is planned …

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8

Underneath the Underneath

October 19th, 2014by Vertrag

This is just a small rant from me about how people only see what they want to see. No one cares enough to look underneath because they don’t want to deal with it. I’m sure all of you have had experiences like this.

That girl who you think has a “cheerful face”?
She cries herself to sleep every night wishing that everything was over.

That girl that you say has it all?
She stares blankly into the darkness everyday wishing that she had not fucked up every chance in her life.

That girl that you see as the braniac who never has to study? The one you think will go …

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8

Off Topic again, oops

October 19th, 2014by Alex

I just looked around a bit more and I’m like “Holy shit, I just saw their suicide notes, I don’t know what to do, what if they go through with their plan? I didn’t speak up, I’m a little piece of shit.” So yeah. o-o I really hope none of you guys go through with your plans of ending life because ya know. *points to new route* There’s a whole new adventure waiting for you in a few years, months or even days.

Lul. I’m such a hypocrite. Telling people to keep holding on when I’m about to just end it all. >.> But hey. You …

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3

Welcome to my fawking rant.

October 19th, 2014by Alex

Ahem. *clears throat* Awkward. TnT Fuck. Anxiety. Let’s see. Lost 3 friends to suicide. 1 had recently attempted. Idk. I used to have a whole group of friends. Depression came by for a visit. Boom. Became distant and just closed myself up from everyone. Avoiding people all day at school unless I’m stuck with a partner. Realized no one gives a shit about me disappearing. Yep. *becomes air* Probably going to fail school because I’m skipping classes to avoid having anxiety attacks even though I still have them. Holy horseshit I’m probably sounding like some little shit right now. *face palms* How did I even …

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4

I’m an attention seeker

October 18th, 2014by frozen_heart

Everyone hates the attention seekers. The ones who always say things to get others attention and pity. The ones who tell someone every inch of his or her personal, tragical and dramatic life just to get a reaction. Attention seekers disgust everyone. People are sick of them.

One thing I hate most about myself, is that I kind of am an attention seeker. I do things to get others pity without even noticing it. It’s like there’s two sides of me; a side who does everything possible to get attention, pity and all the things I wrote about earlier, and a side, who doesn’t want to …

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4

What light at the end, if I am blind?

October 18th, 2014by TheVoidInside

I am not literally blind, just a metaphor saying that I do not understand how I can go on anymore.

Ok so my story is kinda simple, yet elaborate at the same time. First things first, my name is James and I am 13. I have red hair so I am always the one who stands out. I am small for my age, get decent grades, am smarter than most children but I don’t do my work(hence the “decent” grades). I am a little overweight, I eat too much sometimes, and cannot lose weight. I do taekwondo, am a 3rd degree black belt, am state champ …

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2

Cost/Benefit Analysis

October 17th, 2014by Grimwarg

Cost–benefit analysis (CBA) is a systematic approach to estimating the strengths and weaknesses of alternatives that satisfy transactions, activities or functional requirements for a business. It is a technique that is used to determine options that provide the best approach for the adoption and practice in terms of benefits in labour, time and cost savings etc. The CBA is also defined as a systematic process for calculating and comparing benefits and costs of a project, decision or government policy (hereafter, “project”).

Broadly, CBA has two purposes:

    To determine if it is a sound investment/decision (justification/feasibility),
    To provide a basis for comparing projects. It involves comparing the

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4

The white dress

October 16th, 2014by lissbabe

When you dream of you cutting your arms and their never going to stop bleeding and then you step into that bath filled with cold water wearing that white dress and dreaming that you will never belong in this world but in the end why is there so many people that care? Why is it that people feel the need to be there for you when you know your not worth it? Why is it that you feel like you can never let your self live a bit? Why is it that you want to let someone know your deepest secrets but your scared they …

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9

My tragic story…

October 16th, 2014by Maddie

Hello my name is Maddie and I’m 13. I bet some of you are probably thinking ” what would a 13 year old know about being depressed ” well i know alot. It started when i was 5. When i was 5 my mom died in a car accident. I don’t really remember her and it sucks :(. When i was 8 my dad put me up for adoption so i would have a better life. Since i was 8 i’ve been getting bullied because i’m either too fat or too ugly or too short. People just have so much fun judging me. So from …

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4

Useless

October 14th, 2014by cathy9291

I couldn’t keep up with a fast-paced job for even a week.

I can’t even find a good job at all.

I can’t make my boyfriend laugh the way I used to. I can’t tell him anything that will give me more than “yeah well” or “baby”. When he says he loves me, the only thing I can think is that he doesn’t really mean it. He doesn’t ask me how my day is or try to talk about things with me anymore. But God knows he has plenty to tell his friends on his computer game.

I came to New York a month and a half ago …

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6

To the dearly departed.

October 14th, 2014by bmb

Everything is normal. Going along as it does. Then I’m reminded all of the sudden. Your not here. You left us. You killed yourself. It comes with no warning. I can never pinpoint what triggers the blunt reminder. But it steals my breath away. Every time. You. Are. Not. Here. Then the anger comes. It rises, bubbling away under the surface till it reaches my hands. Clenching my fingers into fists. Rises further. Gritting my teeth. Fuck you. Your stupid impulsive decision has ruined our lives. I never thought anyone would be able to make me feel such rage, let alone you. You who were …

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1

Dear Counselor

October 13th, 2014by KissOfDeath

I watch you listen to me,
but do you really hear me?

You use that sweet tone of voice, I’m sure that everyone gets,
I want to trust you, but your eyes are full of judgment and pity.

I am seeking help, but I am sure this is going to doom me.
I have nothing to say, I am choking on my tears.

I am so desperately looking for the solution to fix this problem.

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1

An actor in a play

October 11th, 2014by DawnNeverComes

I feel so pathetic. My life hasn’t even been that bad. I’ve never been physically abused by anyone. Both my parents are alive, and my family isn’t poor…

So why do I feel so depressed… So empty? I feel so tired, but I’m only 13. Why?

Maybe it’s because I have to put on a mask whenever someone is around, after all it’s been that way since I was 9… I think I’m even starting to trick myself with my own mask.

I feel like an actor in a play I never auditioned for… My script is prewritten and made to deceive, my mask to convince. I can’t …

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