Stories of Hope

2

My (shortend) story: Self-Mutilation, Anorexia, Bipolar Disorder, Major Anxiety, and more

January 26th, 2015by Thesomebodytoknow2

I don’t know what the f**k I did to deserve this, I just made one mistake. It all started in 4th grade. I was the very quiet one, a lot of stuff was going around in my mind. I told this one person I was bisexual, I mean, after all she did ask. The next thing I knew, everyone asked me “is it true? Is it true?” I didn’t know what they meant. They explained, the secret was out. For the next 3 years, it was harassment, verbal abuse, physical violence, you. FUCKING. NAME. IT. My life was $#lT. I was a mess. I got …

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0

Think everyone here can relate to this song… The Bravery – “Believe”

January 25th, 2015by B

Not only is this a great song, but I’d imagine that these lyrics can be interpreted by everyone here on a much deeper level than even intended.

 

B

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12

“…six in the magazine, one in the chamber — I’m cocked, locked and ready to rock!”

January 25th, 2015by Shephard

It’s not everyday that a washed up has-been lands himself the type of woman he’d only ever seen in his dreams, but that is my reality at present. I don’t consider that luck or the work of the subterranean lizard folk — I see this (as I’ve always seen this) as the universe sending me the one and only opportunity to live life that I’ll ever have… and if that truly is what she’s been put into my life to facilitate; then boy, is she doing an outstanding job in doing so.

I’m still not without my demons and they’re still doing a good job …

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1

Where’s my damn Epiphone?!

January 20th, 2015by Shephard

There’s a place where it’s just you and me. In all honesty: it’s wherever you may be.

In your room.
Asleep within a field.
Overlooking the rainforest from the cliffs.
On the back of our property, practising weapons drills.
Stuck in the morning traffic.
…and even in our dreams.

No longer can we deny the connection we share, especially if the last three days were anything to go by. We’re tethered to each other in much the same manner that the forward assist had long since become an integral part of the AR-15 platform — if I ever produce a stoppage; you’ll be there to unjam …

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10

Closing the Book/Writing Our Next Adventure.

January 18th, 2015by Shephard

Hey team,

I owe y’all an apology for that appalling post I put up last night. See, I had those thoughts fermenting in my mind for a while now, and despite knowing that I ought to bring them to the attention of my Missus and ONLY my Missus… I decided to spill my guts in a post instead.
I say this from deep within my heart, so believe me when I say… I’m sorry. Apologies have never been a strong suit of mine, due to the fact that I’ve only ever believed that my pale, lifeless body is the only apology that my loved ones …

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3

Idk what to do

January 17th, 2015by darksouI

uhm hi everyone,im new here.so last summer i tried to kill myself with pills but i failed and ended up in hospital for 2 weeks.i was diagnosed with major depression.my whole family thinks this is some kind of joke,they think that theres no way i could be depressed bc im just a teen and its so disgustin and annoying.my parents are horrible.theyre calling me names and expect too much.i cry almost everynight because i cant get their words oyt of my head.my mom thinks “i’ve everything” but to her everything is money and material stuff.they never tried talking to me and always act like everything …

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1

Vulnerability

January 13th, 2015by cr-123456

Hello,

Thanks for taking the time to read this post. I have been thinking about shame and guilt. What I’ve noticed so far that I have done some terrible things in my life as a result of shame. I have intense suicidal thoughts due to shame. Shame, meaning I am a bad person and guilt meaning I have bad behaviors.

At times, I think people use shame and guilt interchangeably, which is detrimental to someone who struggles with mental illness. I have a lot of shame. I am shameful of my ethnic background, I am shameful of my behaviors and people I’ve hurt. There’s several things wrong …

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15

I’m Back, It Helped

January 12th, 2015by moonlitrose34

Soooo…first off, I wanted to thank all the people that gave me all of their encouraging comments on my last post, and in general. (which was about a week ago)

That was when I was hospitalized. I didn’t have my phone..and there were two computers to use the internet, which was crappy, but I think I would’ve thrown a red flag out there had I gotten on here, so I waited until I was out. Today I got discharged from the hospital, and I just wanted to talk about my experience.

So I was terrified when I first went there, I went voluntarily but I was still …

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3

I am MAD!!!

January 11th, 2015by Pretend Girl

I am mad! Mad at my depression that interrupted my life, caused heartache and hurts. Separated me from my family for my emotional safety. I am mad at the counseling I had that went no where because I didn’t understand my emotional state of mind, 20 years later!

Over the years I had counseling, but they said counseling wasn’t about dredging up your past, it’s about moving forward! But if the unresolved thoughts and feelings aren’t examined, it IS what I needed/need.

I tell you I am also mad about how many people are affected this way- family of origin does harm and leaves the child to heal …

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3

Whet My Appetite; Run To Nowhere

January 7th, 2015by killswitchon

Resist the squall that drags and yanks me to an alternate universe. Relinquish control to an imaginary figment of an objective reality locked in a servants watchful absolution. Abolish burdens that manipulate my every impulse. Wrest assured I shall wrench every heartache from your needy, elaborate grasp. Run, run to there, run to nowhere, run everywhere; run, run, run to me. No, run away. She sees my scattered thoughts fleetingly rushing past her discerning web of truth. Physical; handsome insides make for a handsome outside — beauty is only feels deep. Abolish. Allow. Permission to uncover and discover all you have to offer under your …

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1

Each little thing helps!

January 6th, 2015by Pretend Girl

Thet is hard to imagine, in the thick of a depressive moment that emotions can lift and the depression can leave. After years and y,ears dealing with my depression, I find this is all too true! But we must remember, esp in the middle of an episode that it can change and it can lift!

This morning started out rough, last night’s depression continued to linger. I HAD to go to work, I wanted to go to work, but my heart was really back in the muck. So much so that when a lady asked me for a ride, I was mad. Oye. Not like me. …

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16

Thank you guys

January 6th, 2015by moonlitrose34

Thank you guys so much for all your kind words and comments. And all of the people that have been talking to me. You guys really helped.

I just met with my therapist and it’s been decided that I should go to the hospital. I just wanted to let all the people that have been talking to know that. I don’t know if I can come here in the time that I’m at the hospital but I will post again when I’m out.

And bluerabbit, I can’t message you because I’m on my phone, but I just wanted to let you know that I’m fine, and we’ll …

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3

I feel worthless

January 6th, 2015by snailynini

i haven’t posted in a while, I still feel like crap

I really wish I was dead, I feel so stupid writing this. Who even cares about a piece of trash like me anyway. I should just die. Kill myself and get this shit over with

My furture looks horrible. I don’t know what I’m doing with my life. My grades are awful.

“But family will always be there”

No

No they won’t

I feel so fucking alone and i really wish I had at least one friend.

But who wants to deal with my shit and me being all depressed for no good reason

Ugh

I wish I was dead. Sorry for …

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4

Protecting ourselves, especially when we’re in pain

January 4th, 2015by Pretend Girl

I am feeling low. I called my crisis line THREE times before I got it out what was really bothering me. I finally admitted how I don’t want to be, that I was looking for the pills I knew would work. :((( but I could not find them. I stopped looking, good or bad…

The thing is, isn’t it crazy to be mad at the world and people around you but then, you take it out on yourself?? I mean, really, the reaction of wanting to hurt yourself because the world seems off kilter, that is crazy!

And yet, here I am, once again… :(   (Still, something …

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2

My Idea

January 4th, 2015by moonlitrose34

So for the past 2 months, I’ve been extremely depressed. I’ve hardly been able to get anything done. I had to take an incomplete for my class, and everything’s due tomorrow, yet I haven’t even done anything. I’m so screwed. I feel so helpless. It was a few weeks ago where I felt so depressed I thought that if I helped others, if I left little notes for strangers, I might feel better. Which I have been doing, I even started a blog about it called strangerafess.tumblr.com. My friend helped me with writing notes too, except these were supposed to be more funny ones, than …

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2

Goodbye, Goodbye

January 1st, 2015by moonlitrose34

This isn’t anything special. It’s just a poem I wrote at 5 am. Even though it’s not that great, it describes my inner turmoil.

I want to talk about this pain,
That I’ve felt was always in vain,

Do you really not see,
What’s become of me?

On silent nights,
I always fight,

As tears run down my eyes,
Each teardrop breaking my ties,

My ties with this world,
As I am hurled,

Into this insanity,
Which will never set me free.

My teardrops slowly become red,
Food for the blade that I’ve fed.

They tell me that all will be well,
While I slowly rot away in this hell,

Could they not tell that I am shackled,
To the voices inside that …

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0

Culture Society of Authority and Dominance

December 28th, 2014by LoveIsEverything

I feel our culture / society of obedience, authority, and dominance is terrible and it hurts me inside that it exists. There doesn’t seem to be what I define as love in the world. There are people that say they “love” me, but I don’t feel it. Their love is more about fulfilling societal expectations then it is about a deep connection with me or with someone / anyone they say they love.

People prioritize their duties, expectations and their appearance more than anything else it seems, including what they define as “love”. But for me, love, relationships are the most important thing to me, the …

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18

Life is empty & meaningless, without any/no purpose, Life is boring, empty! There is no meaning of life! fuck life, fuck reality !

December 28th, 2014by niki

Life is empty & meaningless, without any/no purpose, Life is boring, empty! There is no meaning of life! fuck life, fuck reality !

The more I grow up & learn after all these 32 years of my life, sadly, the more I feel hopeless especially for humanity / our humans species!
MAJORITY of people / humans beings / humanity are so damn shallow, superficial, vain, ignorant, stupid, fake, dirty, liars, etc etc.
I used to have so much HOPE for humanity , but now the hope is dwindling until it’s almost none !!
MOST people are sadly only concerned with vain, shallow, mundane “daily-life” & little things like …

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4

Hope For The Holidays

December 25th, 2014by blue.rose

Christmas is a time where friends and family come together celebrate the season of giving as well as make you realize some of the good people that are in our lives that make us feel joy, not about material items. However Christmas can be a time where it can bring a lot of misery and doubt to those who are lonely or don’t see the good in anything even themselves or even lost a loved one. I just want to remind those who are having a tough time during the holiday that you are still worth something and that no amount of expensive gifts can …

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9

Warning ! Psychiatric meds can suck

December 21st, 2014by Patrick Anarchy

Some of you might  disagree or not believe this story but its the  TRUTH.

A lot of doctors and psychiatrists are NOT even aware themselves just how terrible psychiatric meds are because they are misinformed or lied to from the drug companies which FUND Psychiatry itself. Psychotropics made me very helpless against my depression and some could have permanently disfigured me.  They lowered my inhibitions  and I did things which I permanently regret now. I was prescribed 16 different psych meds at different times in the last 6 years.

You should all consider reading MEDICATION MADNESS by Dr. Peter Breggin. a Psychiatrist who is FIRMLY against psychiatric medications. The book changed my life , …

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