Suicidal Survivors

For those who have survived suicide.

4

Hello everyone! <3

May 2nd, 2015by kalmahavak

Hi everybody! You may have seen me posting comments giving you my email and KIK name. (My email is andrewholstein1@gmail.com and my KIK is Kalmahavak if you want to talk to me and be friends :)) I’m a senior in high school that is absolutely TERRIFIED of the future. I have been for years not understanding what my purpose in life is, and just worried about the future. That is, until recently. Anyways, here’s my story.

I think it all started after 6th grade when my parents first put me into public school after homeschooling me all my life. I was bullied a lot for no …

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4

im trying to be strong

April 30th, 2015by mak1shimayuusuke

but its just so hard….. I suffer from manic depression and existential anxiety. two days ago, I stood by a main road and contemplated jumping in front of a car. my mind told me that I wanted to die, but it also told me that I might die, and I was afraid. my father ran to me and pulled me away. my mom is mainly the reason… she hits me and tells me im worthless. I don’t tell the authorities because every time I try my mom says that she know how to hit me in ways that wont leave a mark and that they …

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8

Nostalgia: azul e doce

April 28th, 2015by Tristeza

Mid 2013
I remember my first post on sp, one that I felt like I had to delete months ago. I was hiding in my room, scared because my ex step dad had tried to touch me again. He was a monster. A rapist. A demon wearing the mask of a good, loving religious man. My mom had already made it clear that she would stay with him and that I was the only liar at their house; calling me the devil and trying to kick me out when I had nowhere to go. My story is too long and not the point right now, but …

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1

For a pessimist, I’m quite optimistic

April 26th, 2015by cold_blooded_freak

It’s been about three or four years since I’ve last posted something and in that time I’ve graduated high school, joined the military, got married and subsequently divorced, moved on in my life. I’ve done so many things that I didn’t think I would. So if you think your story ends here, you may be missing out on the best moments that have yet to happen.

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1

My story</3

April 21st, 2015by Kya-bug

My story starts when I was little, my mom was seventeen going on eighteen when she had me and my sister. She struggled to make ends meet and she still wanted to go out and have fun like any young mom would, my father wasn’t around for the first three years of my life so my mom used to find babysitters or drop us off with family, she would be gone for night and nights on end my family told me. When I turned  three me and my sister were dropped off with my aunt and uncle and custody was handed over to them, my mom …

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5

This world is boring , boring world . why movies, games, anime/manga, fantasy / imagination is better than this world / better than life / real life / real world / reality ?

April 20th, 2015by niki

I hate this world .
This world is so boring , boring world !
Why movies , games , anime / manga, & fantasy / imagination is better than this world / better than life / real life / real world / reality ?

everyday life is the same : wake up, eat, go to school/work, boring, then go back home, eat, then sleep, then repeat again.
but movie / game / anime / manga / comics / books are much more exciting & interesting than this boring life !
for example: like in the world / universe of Harry Potter, Avatar, Lord of the Rings, Narnia, Marvel / …

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21

Police Investigation Photos

April 20th, 2015by loquism

1The police take photographs of the body and face. During autopsy as well. Is there some way to prevent this? Do they destroy the photos after a set time? I’m not comfortable with the idea of being photographed while dead

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3

It never fully seems to go away…

April 19th, 2015by misssK88

I’ve had two serious suicide attempts:

The first time I tried to kill myself (around age 14) was after my best friend had done the same a week prior and I couldn’t stand living without him. I chose to hang myself, but the beam I used to tie the rope on ended up snapping. I fell, hit my head and was knocked unconscious. My mother heard me fall and found me up in the attic and then called the EMS. I had a huge lump on my head, which ended up being a mild concussion and my throat was all sore and messed up afterwards. I …

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1

Ranting Time

April 19th, 2015by prosser6

So I’ve been alone for a long time, practically all my life. And this recent suicidal phase I’ve gone thru hasn’t helped that at all. Scarred myself up good I did. Even slicing my arm open on a hacksaw by accident one day. I’ve grown a loving for the color black and everything about. In color theory, it’s either the presence of every color or the absence. I like to think every color is present.

 

But anyway, I’ve made plans and I’ve screwed it into my head that I’m probably going to end up dying alone in my old age. And I think I’m prepared for …

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15

My life has crashed again.

April 18th, 2015by Ed

After a suffering childhood with to much suicide attempts and other violence in my family i at age 5 landed in shock. Child protection came in after my sisters suicide attempt but my parents kept there dirty laundry for them self they did not explain what was happening just blamed the kids. Child protection did not see i was in shock thought i was stupid and hard to handle. At age 6 they dumped me by trick in closed house of correction for the aggressive retarded children. 5 Years there with all the torture really fucked me up for life. It was not the beatings it was …

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22

Too much stress & wanting to cry

April 16th, 2015by simran

I am 30 female. I having hypertension because of too much stress… always want to cry I need love from my husband but he is changed now before marriage he is totally different he care for me never wants to me to cry but he is the reason for my stress. he didnt like my parents I am living in Australia. he wants that his parents live with us I have no problem but nowdays I need my mother I have small baby but he said that he never wants to my mother come there what should I doand he never wants that I goto …

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4

Suicide plan

April 15th, 2015by spiltmilk1

Hey there, Basically I’m 18 dropped out of school. Ive been facing mental health problems since i was 15 and tried to take my own life. I was hospitalised this year for 9 weeks and then a day patient for 6 weeks after. Im no better and I’ve the doctors have decided to stop treating me as they don’t know whats wrong. anyhow due to this fact that i can’t be helped and my lack of future and many many other things I’ve decided that tonight I’m going to take my own life.

does anybody have any tips on like is there anyway i can make …

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2

moving on…

April 14th, 2015by munckin

Wondering starting to date again… I like one girl more then the others she is cute and sweet. She is originally from the country that I moved too 6 years ago. But also lived in the east and southern of Europe.

She is 8 years older then me. I don’t mind. I actually quite like it as I would like children and I think she would want them too. I wonder though if it is a wise step.. in the longer run for my happiness if that path were to happen….

we click really well so I do not really for see problems in that …

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8

Destined For A Life-long Misery

April 3rd, 2015by fuckedup4life

I don’t remember being happy, ever. Since I was 11 years old I’ve been thinking of running away from my so-called home. When I turned 12 I had my first suicidal thought. Since I turned 15 I’ve been attempting suicide every two years. I am 22 now and I just attempted suicide yesterday, but failed as usual.

It doesn’t change, it never will. My life has been nothing but a series of unfortunate events. I hate myself, I hate my life, but I don’t hate life. I wanna live a life, but not mine.  I wish that one day I open my eyes and look in the mirror …

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5

I…don’t really know anymore.

April 3rd, 2015by XTheForgottenOnesX

I just..I don’t quite know. I just need to write down my thoughts..Pointless thoughts, that will most likely be over-looked as my life mostly is.

I should probably start from the beginning. When it all began. When I first sank into depression.

5 Years ago, I used to have a friend named Jessica. We hung out all the time.. She was my best friend, we grew up together. One day she sends me this text..and I knew something was wrong. This damn text is engraved into my mind. “I’m sorry, for everything, Thank you so much for being my friend. I’ll see you soon…but not too soon. …

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16

Getting things in order, before I leave again…

April 1st, 2015by jreyes

It was February 20, 2014. Everything was all setup, rope (was seemingly) tight. The chair. The knots were okay. Put the noose over my head… tightened it. Kicking that chair was the hardest thing that I had to do. The feeling was so liberating, I was finally going to be free… one less person for the world to think of. I remember struggling at first, trying to pull myself up, trying to breathe but can’t. It’s not a bright light like they say… it was all just pitch black and quiet. I was at peace in that darkness, I wanted to stay there forever. I …

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2

Cycle

March 29th, 2015by RainbowsnPuppies

I have this cycle. I am okay. Or at least I have myself almost convinced I am okay. And then I am less okay. And less okay. Until I am in this pit where nothing but my darkness exists. And I’ve been trying to cut out the darkness. Hoping precisely made incisions will help with all this pain. Maybe if I slit open the right spot it won’t hurt this much. But it does. I always fall back into this hole. And I don’t want to do it anymore.

The other day I wrapped up all my loose ends and went to sleep praying to a …

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1

I don’t want to go back

March 26th, 2015by Streamers

Not back to the hospital.

I’ll cover my arms.

I don’t have anything else.

It stings, this was my first time with a blade.

It didn’t hurt, does that make me broken?

I don’t have any therapy until Monday.

I didn’t do my homework.

I’m a failure.

But I don’t want to go back.

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6

How I Didn’t Commit Suicide in a Theater

March 24th, 2015by Riolkin

I stood on the railing in complete darkness. The glow tape on the stage below gave me an idea of the distance I would be falling. It wouldn’t be enough on it’s own, I’d have to dive head first in order to finish the job. The warmth of the upper level of the theater was comforting in what I thought were my final moments. My balance shifted, causing the thin cuts above my knee to reopen, my blood mixing with the nervous sweat I was covered in.

From this vantage point I could see all parts of the stage. I often came to this very spot …

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