I wanted to thank one person for asking if I can use help locating resources in my town, I appreciate it, actually I already have been using resources in my area, and unfortunately being bi-polar, I am to the point in my life where I trust almost no-one. Seems when I tell people that know me I am bi-polar, all of a suddenly I am treated differently. I had an experience about a month ago one of my AA sponsors already knew me a little and long story short made me feel like a psycho, so to him I say F**** off. One last thing […]
when u meet someone start talking and we act like best friends and talk for hours and then all of a sudden rarely talk WTF i worry that i said something wrong or worry that somethings going on and they wont tell me. (not like it would be my business, i would just like to know) hmmm soo annoying makes me go crazy
Hello, I’m marissa and I’m suicidal, achoolic, drug addict, and anorexic. I’m 14 and I drink and do drugs every night. I make myself puke 3 times a day. I have suicidal thoughts every night.
I live with my mom and her husband(sadly my step dad) I’m verbaly abused by both of them everyday. I was several times physical. I have no control over my life. I’ve tried to runaway but I always get caught. I’ve tried to take my life but always get talked out.
My father wasn’t there at my birth and was really never there for me. He moved to Florida when […]
You can call me Robert for now, even though that’s not my true name. You’ll never know my actual name, unfortunately, because I won’t be around to tell it to you. Obviously, i plan to kill myself, but you would be mistaken if you thought that i was sad right now. As a matter of fact,this is the first time that I’ve felt happy in years! Finally, finally, I have found a way to end myself; to put a stop to the horrible thing that is my mind.
Over the years, I have been plagued with psychopathy. I couldn’t even walk down the fucking street without […]
i dont believe in fairy tales
I dont believe in wishing wells
i dont believe in love at first sight
I dont believe in strolls under the moonlight
I dont believe in one final kiss
I dont believe in it’s you I’ll miss
I dont believe in it’s meant to be
I dont believe in it’s you and me
I dont believe in my heart is yours
I dont believe in love’s chores
I dont believe in butterflies
I dont belive in the feeling’s lies
I dont believe in reminiscing
I dont believe in kissing
I dont believe in together
I dont believe in forever
I really dont believe […]
i can’t control how it feels and functions. I alter its actions if i try hard enough but i rarely have the strength. i want one thing but my body usually wants another. i wish my brother were never born so i wouldnt feel obligated to take care of him, but my body says i love him. i want to be a swinging polygamist for the rest of my days but my body says im afraid of people, women especially. i want careers, cars, cash and success but my body says theres no value in that; that i must be with people to be happy. […]
This is first time I have ever posted on web about suicide, this is actually pretty cool. I will not go into all my problems, just to the point where as so many other times in my life, I question why am I living? I have lost really great jobs, decent marraige, etc. and now I feel alone. I also like many others here have seen countless therapists, doctors, been diagnosed with two different things by several doctors, bottom line – I am miserable, I hate where my life is, unfortunately I do not have the balls to commit suicide. I prayed even today several […]
I think its possible the monster energy drink is what’s causing my erratic behavior.Â
On a side note, I still can’t chew even a fucking donut. Really hurts when I do. Or a slice of pizza.Â
(805) 861-5295
Thats in case you wanna text me if youre in the vicinity of me.Â
So I just met schizojinx. Awesome girl. Um ifonlyallofyoknew: I am sorry i was being an asshole yesterday. I was angry and took my anger out on you i dont normally do that and all i can blame it on is the monster i drank. Howtosurvive: text me, sorry I fell asleep. Anyone wanna chat? My […]
i’m dying
I just posted a book in a reply to a post I read on here. This site isn’t what I was looking for however I am grateful to have found it. This topic of conversation isn’t exactly what you feel comfortable or welcome to discuss openly with anyone. I don’t advocate suicide for anyone, it’s horrible in fact and when I think about the impact it has on the people who care about you it does feel selfish. I can only speak about my own situation. Today is a very dark, lonely day and I have never felt more isolated or alone in my life. […]
well…finally got this thing running…im schizojinxx, but please, call me lexi. im schizophrenic, emo, bipolar, depressed and psychotic at times. i have very few, but VERY nice friends. i enjoy drawing, but i SUCK at drawing people…i cut, often. but i am going to try burning. i atempt suicide often…VERY often but im scared of how my friends would get on. fu(k my family, they dont care. i curse alot so yeah..thats me for ya…i hope to find someone like me on here…
If u have a incurable disease that can be past though your genes it would be cruel to have children and pass it on. Yet my mum has had depression all her life and still had me and passed it on to me. Then I did the same like her and 2 of my 3 children have depression. I have great regret bringing them in the world and inflicting pain on them. It is selfish to have children to satisfy your own selfish needs. I wanted to be a mother and I didn’t once think about them. If I could turn back time I wouldn’t […]
My father’s existance summarizes how my life has been for me in a metaphorical term. Emotional blackmail.
My father calls me 24 times a day sometimes more for very trivial things. I do them. If i don’t I know what will happen.
Trash, yard, clean, glass of water, make my food, find my shoes, shave my beard, find my clothes, mow the lawn, water the grass, find my glasses, where’s my tooth brush, let’s get groceries. You go in the store I’ll stay outside (he talks on the phone to some woman i don’t know) Oh i didn’t give you enough money? How much is the […]
anyone live in Idaho?
There’s so much misery here, but it’s so nice outside. Things aren’t as they say in the paper and on the news. There are no bombs or psycho killers; just people trying to get by.
Why don’t I have anything to say… uhhhhh, I’m so confused right now. I’m hungry, have some broccoli and half a cucumber in the fridge, eggos in the freezer, apple on my table, but I don’t want any of it. I don’t want to move. Some stupid part of me thinks that if I sit here looking stupefied and feeling like a bag of crap for long enough, I’ll simply cease […]
Amy, its been 3 years since your passing and I want to leave you a message but never knew where without being ridiculed and questioned whether or not I’m not ok. I was thinking of the day we me so young and carefree I was hopeless and depressed when you met me. That changed so quickly I suddenly had purpose for everything I had a reason to like myself and to like the world around me. I still have your glasses from freshman year safely perched next to the last picture of us, the last time I didn’t fake my smile, the last time […]
Who am I kidding?? I’ll never be OK
I am the Slave of Depression. This must be the main thing that made me this way
Anyway I’ve  always had a dose of craziness in me…Why can’t I be happy?Everyone around me knows how sad and unhappy I am but they don’t give a damn.They even make things worse
I need a miracle! I don’t wanna be like this anymore
wells, today, actually every thursday in the summer means a break from my sisters’ demands, since she will be at a friends, but instead i decide to speed on my bike and flip right over it, now my legs is torn and it hurts just to stand this isnt much of a problem except i was supposed to hang with friends (rare, very rare) the one day i get out im forced to sit on the couch all day…grrrr this is fucked.
…about life, the universe and everything, send me a mail at
anon46 [.at.] lavabit [.dot.] com
I’ve got various instant messaging accounts, but I prefer plain old e-mail or google talk.
If you happen to live nearby (although that is highly unlikely), I’d even go out with you for a coffee…
I’m so sick. Everyone wants me dead. Why do I keep trying to find someone to hold on to? Noone will ever care about me. I can’t keep the happy face anymore, it’s just too much. Everytime that I show someone the agony inside they’re like “Run for the hills”. I will always be alone. Noone could ever love a stupid loser like me. I thought that I could help if I would talk to people around here. But how could a fuck up like me ever help anyone when I can’t even help myself? Everyone is going to be better without me. Nobody will […]