For as long as I can remember… dating back to even kindegarten.. yep I remember feeling like this then.. I have been walking around with this feeling and allow me to tell you it is awful. One would think I should be used to this … stomach always in my throat… never feeling as if I fit in.. lonely… never good enough.. just want to be alone but then I get lonely.. etc. etc. etc.////One would thing I am used to feeling this “FEELING” but I am not. I have been in therapy for almost 4 years.. been a drug addict… became an Rn… raised and still raising three beautiful kids… been sober… been in abusive and nonabusive relationships… thought I had good friends.. but didn’t. I HAVE DONE IT ALL AND I STILL HATE THIS>. I don’t believe it goes away. I was born not to be here. A mistake.