December 8th, 2008 by francis caroline

cancer 1996. failed chemo. bmt 2004. husband broke vows, skrewed babysitter whne I was 8 months pregnant. i did not throw him out. too scared to be alone. have two amazing sons. am chronically sick and disabled post transpalnt. we are broke without my income. he earns nothing. failed at numerous careers. now I am sick, tired, unable to changr anything, unenpowered. he is visous, brutal, angry. I am scared, sad and weak. i want out. if i had died during transplant it would have been so much better. i am fat from steriods and 56 drugs I take per dya. I cannot muster up any more energy. i just want out now. the boys will be OK,,not easy but they do care about my health anymore – its OK, everuone says that s because I am successfl with them. please let me go.. please i beg of you

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