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just another day…

by chill

i dont know where to start… i have been dealing with depression, stress, anxiety and occasional suicidal thoughts now for years. i never (until recently) talked to anyone about my problems, which i believe was a huge mistake. i feel that this problem i have within myself is hurting not only myself, but those around me. every day has its ups and downs, and some days are better than others… i feel empty inside, i cant carry on conversation with anybody because i feel like i dont have anything interesting to say and i find myself struggling to try and talk, so i just sit back and listen and watch the world evolve around me. im tired, emotionally and physically. i feel like im a huge dissapointment to those around me, even though i am not. even as i type this i just feel a huge emptyness within myself, and i cant even type out in words how i feel… i dont know how much longer i can deal with this feeling, it hurts so bad! today will not be my last day i know that already, but someday soon i may find myself in a place where i cannot go any further. i wish i could get a grip on this hurting i feel, im tired of crying, tired of hurting… just tired of living. but i continue to hold my head up and try to believe something good is just around the corner. have a good day everyone.


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Sirachick 2/16/2009 - 2:56 am

So, what I got from this is that you don’t see a reason to live, days go by and nothing changes, your existence makes no impact…

So try to find something that changes. Do something progressive. You could try acting, there is probably a little theater class in your town… there usually is unless it’s really small.

Dancing, Sports, IDK, something that you work towords something, weather it be beating another team, putting on a show, whatever.

Jerry 3/22/2009 - 6:24 am

been there, felt that, got better and now I feel like i’m slipping back into that place…Fuck

Christina 10/24/2009 - 9:59 am

e-mail me im here to talk or w/e i know exactly how you feel! mkafan12@yahoo.com

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