Devil’s Child

  April 20th, 2009 by Sirachick

I always hurt the ones i love. I have created a character, a personality, and the world is my stage.

“The world is a stage and we are merely actors” or something like that, it’s by shakespear or someone else old and famous…

I’m never me. Yes, I’m an actor, but outside of that, I’m to different people. As soon as I walk outside, I’m a different person, take a deep breath, time to put on a show. One in which I’m an annoying singing girl who talks a lot, listens to goth and emo music, and uses words that are to big for most people my age to understand. My character is a loser. I chose that, I couldn’t pull off prep, they’re too… annoying.

The real me is evil. I’m mean, and i hurt people, I take them in, I’m nice to them, because when I start a project I get into it. I want it. This one, this project, this new “friend” I’m going to be nice to. I will be what it needs. I’ve been a girlfriend, a best friend, a kid to pick on… whatever they need. Then I’ll get mad. I’ll give up on life. (It doesn’t matter anyways) And I’ll break them. They will want to die, or at least be in a hell lot of pain. I don’t want to be this way, but it’s too much… I can’t act my hole life… It’s been 14 years of torcher, pretending, ACTING, I don’t want to life another second, and I like to watch ppl fall…. it’s amusing…

I don’t see a reason for me to live. I’ve got a great life, no reason to complain, parents and sister love me, good grades, nice home, good talent (Acting and singing) I just want to die. I don’t want to feel the pain of falling down and scraping my knee. I don’t wanna be board because I’m not doing anything but I’m to lazy to do anything. I want to think, feel, want, need, be, nothing. Nothingness is great. Nothingness is everything I want, I couldn’t imagine anything better.

I’m evil… I hate myself… I’m selfish… I’m cute/pretty(depending on how I dress)… I’m the devil’s child. *Insert Evil laugh… which I have, I sound like a chipmunk-witch*

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