I hate school like i can honestly say i do except for my math teacher she is amazing. I havent been going and my mom gets pissed at me for not going but she doesnt understand that i feel like one of the “out crowd” kids cause i am over weight and ive never actually got called fat well i have but its like in one of those “funny” ways well they think its funny and i just put a smile on my face and act like its nothing but it hurts really bad. Ive told my mom but she thinks its all bull but its not. I have a sister who i always talk to but idk its like i cant say anything to anyone cause im going through that problem not them ME. Sometimes i feel the need of suicide is all i have. I havent cut myself and im proud i havent cause ive read other peoples stories and see how that messes up a lot of things. But im on the verge of doing so.Â
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They say black makes you look “smaller” so i try to get everything black thats cute so i wont look to “goth” but its not working cause i dont like wearing black all the time i loveeeee color but i cant wear it. I cant wear a lot of things cause i am over weight so when i see other girls at school wearing something i say thats cute but no. I really wanna start a clothing line for plus sized girls with cute clothes unlike other plus size clothes. I would call myself pretty (not trying to be conceited) but everyone says i am so i take their word but if i was smaller i would be beautiful. I know its not about whos the skinniest or whos the prettiest but sometimes it feels like that. I just wanna get away from everything and get myself healthy but how are you suppose to do that when everything is screwed up? We cant and we should not compare our sufferings but sometimes thats all we can do when our life is screwed…….
4 comments
I don’t really know how that is. I’m really skinny and was called anorexic the same why you were called fat. I had no way of gaining wight, still don’t, stupid metabolism…
Ok, so you’re fat right? Well, instead of putting so much energy into being upset about it, try doing physical activity. (Wow, I’m a hypocrite)
You’ll never look good in all cloths, cloths are made for different body types…But try wearing stuff that fits you, I’m not saying you do this, but a lot of time, people wear really baggy stuff or stuff that’s to small on them. It ends up making them look bigger. You can wear colour, black isn’t always sliming, and just cause it’s known as it, doesn’t mean you can’t look good in other colors.
Thank you and i understand what you are saying but ive been writing in a journal it helps a lot well for me it does and everyday i usually say about 100 nasty comments to myself so when i say 100 nasty comments i say 200 good things im doing better since im seeing a counselor and therapist but thank you and god bless you
Black is not a colour, it is the absence of colour ( I am Canadian so that is spelled right) Colours reflect mood and so we all wear colour to reflect how we feel. Black truly is bloody depressing, as a fact! It is why people wear black to funerals. It makes you feel somber and less likely to giggle or be distracted.
Choosing black for slimming works only if the clothes fit you. if you feel bright and cheerier in red, WEAR IT! Red empowers me and although I am still overweight ( I was obese) I am called lovely and happy and full of personality. That’s because I AM! I smile and am more confident when I wear clothes that make my body look it’s best and in the colours I choose to wear to feel good.
So many teens have poor knowledge of how they really look or what their true body image is. Please learn to love yourself because we can be our worst enemy by sharing mostly negative thoughts and few positive thoughts with ourselves.
I challenge you to take a step in the right direction. Tell that wonderful math teacher who you love that you have not been coming to school because you feel fat and out of place. Telling someone you trust is important in healing. Talk to your parents if you can. Sometimes opening one door leads to incredible opportunities. You have closed too many doors… so go on try it… What do you have to lose.
Oh Britt, I should have read all the comments! You opened doors are are being positive! Good and I wish you happy days and a bright future! Thanks for sharing with others how you are coping with your distress.
When you are healed, come back and help others find the path to their healing. Hugs and more hugs for taking care of the most important person on the planet… you!