Death is freedom.

July 4th, 2009by Schism

I would start with a bit of information about me (age, interests, blah blah blah) but that is just ego and unimportant, lets get to the reason i’m feeling this way.

I feel so caged and alone, i have no friends, my only family member is my dad, i have no love interest in my life as i seem to always push most females away with my “clingyness” but people just won’t grasp that all I want is to be loved and cared for, if I meet a girl I like I treat them like a princess, like they are the only thing on this planet… and that is rarely reciprocated which hurts…alot and i end up being avoided and eventually told to fuckoff, everyday i sit in front of this computer knowing nobody out there is thinking about me or that loves me.

My contact list on my mobile is literally empty, i have nobody to call when i’m feeling low, i have never done the whole “cutting yourself” routine as that is subconsciously just attention seeking.

Now people might say “get off your ass and get a job, it will keep your mind active and help you meet new people” now yes i understand where you are coming from if you want to suggest that BUT i CANNOT find happiness in slavery, i do not want to work 9 to 5 every single day of my fucking life earning pieces of paper to spend on BULLSHIT products i don’t want or NEED and to also be shafted with bills WE SHOULD NOT FUCKING BE PAYING AS WE SHOULD BE RUNNING ON FREE ENERGY BY NOW, do some research on
Nikola Tesla and you will understand what i mean, is that all 21st century life is about? Work, sleep, work, sleep and then get a pat on the back and some pieces of paper to go out and spend on crap? This is NOT freedom, i CANNOT be happy if I am never free, i swear i’d be happier living in the jungle with a tribe living off the land and TRUELY being free.

Ugh, i won’t go into to much detail about how we are being systematically fucked over by the powers that be, if only i had that someone in my life to make it worth living i just wanna be held and cared for and to be told i’m loved, I’ve tried dating sites…the majority of women there have no brains whatsoever with 2 line profiles and only care about themselves and maybe a lay..and then i ponder to myself “what will i do when my dad dies?” i will TRUELY be alone, we live in a council house too so nothing belongs to me, i will have nobody and nothing, he is the only reason I haven’t killed myself already even though we barely communicate.

Please…get me out of this 3 dimensional prison….NOW.

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