I want to die without pain

Stress! Sleeping pills, tranquillizers, Librium, and Valium won’t help.
Easily agitated. And the heart palpitated at times. Hands and feet would tremble at anger. What on earth brought my mate to treat me like this? Mazed. Amnesia. What was I doing? This is not the life I’d like to have.
My tongue even had ulcer, must have been bitten during meals when my mate nagging this and that.
And my period just ended. The lack of blood might be the reason I felt dizzy.
When hungry, the meals were hamburgers. Never will eat the tasteless vegetables, such puking vegetarian food.
The above apparently demonstrates the symptoms of lacking folic acids which are abundant in vegetables.

Out there are many depression cases. They can be easily detected by testing blood samples, which differentiate the deficiency of vitamins and minerals.
One ought to be discriminating in the term of death. An insane death is unforgiven.

If you are a chronic bed-ridden, or sentenced to live by the european practician, you can consider spending 3 months vacation in China trying out the traditional Chinese medicine of a history of 3000 years old which matters in balancing the body.
I’m just a small potato, an ordinary amateur, if compared to the able doctors and extraordinary healers in different parts of China. All I did best was just instructing a daughter know how to massage her paralysed mother in coma to walk back home after a month and a half.

Years ago, a friend told me she once visited a doctor determining her infertility cause was the baby-size of womb, just by checking the pulse on her wrist. She disbelieved in chinese medicine, but had to find out the truth after the x-ray examined.

When the health issues are ruling out, all problems remained related to only two words ‘letting go’.

Admit that you are defeated. Don’t try to overcome it. Expectation kills. What was or who belonged to you, is now no more. Let go all that don’t belong to you, money, love, possession, or people. You are now here to accept the consequence. It was just a course in the path of yours. Construct now, for yourself, or your left behind persons, or your deceased, a brand new prospect. A monument, a fund, or a new path of yours. You are left behind because you are to do more work. New way of thinking. It signals that you have to change. A change to a brighter lane or culdesac is up to you. The road is yours to travel. But the change is from loving others to loving thyself. Without the love of yourself, you are in no position to say love or be loved.

Stretch your tendons, loosen all your tense joints. The time that you have a look that presentable enough in front of a mirror you yourself will say ‘Hi’ to, you are reformed.

At last, there are several methods of ending life.
1/ Taking in Panadol (not Aspirin) over 20 pills. The poison is enough to damage your liver and kidney functions. But I can’t guarantee no pain or into a vegetable state.
2/ Carbon poisoning. Put an exhaust hose into the car,  inhale the CO and CO2. But news reported that some unbearably withdrew and asking for help, some were found dead with foamy mouths and pigmented black faces, some ended in vegetable state, some died but after a month in hospital.
3/ Sleeping in bed while burning a pile of charcoal. Many were dead with bubbling mouth. One case was that the 7-years old son was strangled to death besides the foamy rescued father. The father later explained that the son awoke from the ordeal and tried to struggled out… This made me wonder, if no pain, why struggle, why foamy mouth. Another case was that, a bankrupt billionaire was rescued from his boat. After a coma of few months, he came to, and began active again. Shortly after, a tumor the size of an apple grown on one side of his cheek bone for a year, and was then removed. It was believed to be the side effect of the poison he inhaled. After that, he lived like a zombie of vanities of prostitutes and drugs in a hotel room, owned and supported by his friend, for years, but without the news of a further attempt. Was the experience that bad to further another attempt?
4/ Execution by injection. Death usually occurs within seven minutes, although the whole procedure can take up to 2 hours.
   The drugs are a cocktail of Potassium Chloride, Sodium Thiopental and Pancuronium Bromide.
   Potassium Chloride–highly-concentrated solution, drug to stop the heart, can cause severe pain.
   Sodium Thiopental–(US-Sodium Pentothal) an anaesthetic agent, to render the offender unconscious in a few seconds.
   Pancuronium Bromide–(US-Pavulon) a muscle relaxant. Some states use tubocurarine chloride and succinylcholine chloride.

The drugs mentioned each portion has to be calculated according to different body weight. Different drugs are utilized because each authority has his viewpoint  to be the best. There were cases of prolonged death. And the question of muscle relaxant applied is–do they still feel pain even though they can’t move? Just as the victims surviving from the surgery table, came to, could tell what really happened while they were awoke during operation. But you would never know about the ones gone through execution.