A Million Different Reasons for the Same Old Shit

October 22nd, 2009by Leighton

Because I could put on all the makeup in the world and I wouldn’t be beautiful.
Because I gave you everything I had to give.
Because I always forget to see the end.
Because I think this is the end. Of something anyway.
Because I’ll never be good enough.
Because forever is a lie.
Because I’ll never be able to fill this hole.
Because I’m alone.
Because this hurts more than I ever imagined.
Because I’m not really good at anything.
Because I fuck everything up.
Because I’ve lost something I cannot replace. 
Because I didn’t come here to find love or friends. But somehow both happened upon me. And I want them to unhappen
Because I want to leave this place and never look back.
Because I really hope I’ll wake up and not be here anymore.
Because my whole body hurts. 
Because I want to be home.
Because I forgot where I came from.
Because I haven’t truly smiled or laughed in a long time.
Because I don’t want to get out of bed in the morning anymore.
Because lately all I do is cry.
Because everything went wrong all at once.
Because I want to binge drink.
Because I don’t want anyone anymore 
Because everyone lets you down in the long run.
Because I’m terrified.
Because I hate my body.
Because I don’t wanna be in my own skin.
Because most of the people I thought had my back turned on me suddenly.
Because I want to feel safe.
Because I want a place to call home.
Because I don’t feel like I have anything to live for anymore.

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