Does it ever happen to anyone that this shit just comes out of the blue? It does for me, every couple of months, weeks, for no reason, I just get this overwhelming desire to die. If I’m lucky, it only lasts a couple of weeks, but sometimes it goes on for months. It doesn’t matter what’s going on in my life, because at those times, nothing matters, all I can think of is just putting an end to myself. I walk by rivers, I think about drowning, I walk by trees, I think about hanging, I look at a knife, and there’s another sweet death for me. I mean, there’s nothing wrong with my life other than what I’ve created for myself, which is mostly shit. But sometimes I think that maybe I’ve just reached a limit, and the self-destruct switch has been activated–if only I could figure out how it works. I don’t know, it just sort of seems like I have no say in the matter. What’s a person to do?