Everyone has a reason to be upset. They lost a loved one, They have a fatal sickness, They lost friends, Something. For me it’s different. I go to a great middle school where I have plenty of friends, nice teachers and my grades are up. I have parents that love me and provide a house and food for me. My brothers and sister care about me and always help me out. I have a boyfriend that I’ve been with for three months. Sounds pretty good, doesn’t it? Well for some reason it’s not. For some reason I’m constantly trapped in my room crying for hours, or slicing open my arms, or taking pills. I try to hide it all, I wear long sleeves at school, I don’t cry in front of any one and I smile even when it hurts. I’m thirteen and scared, scared of being alone but that fear is staring me right in the eyes. I have no one to talk to, no one that understands me, no one that will stick with me. I feel like people don’t see me, they see through me. I don’t want to deal with crying every night, with having to cover my arms everywhere I go and being alone. It’s hard and I don’t know how much longer this is going to go on ..
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Dear Rose petals
I will be here for as long as you need to chat with me, and also email me at alvaro@ya.ru if you are upset. The first thing we are going to do, is leave the thing about upsetting your arms leave them alone and lets work on the constructive way. For a start I can already tell you that I am fully certain everything is going to be alright. That is in the future you will look back into your past and will assess your situation as what it was the fact that you were 13 and at that age many many many things cannot be seen in a global perspective but they even become like huge for oneself. I would need to chat more with you to get to the roots of why you are feeling like that but my intuition is telling me that on the one side, you are a girl with a lot of sensitivity and desire to chat and communicate maybe at a different level. Maybe you have heard already a lot about this world and you feel that the standard communications of humans are in general terms not as profound as you would like to be? like you would like to chat for hours and hours about something special of you or that you love and you feel that nobody gets to that level?
As you well said, there are like two kind of things that would affect the mood of a person, one would be the Objective things as you pointed out, a disease, the lost of someone so something that comes from outside. The other one would be the subjective, that is, there is not a clear cause that anybody would see, but it is how the individual perceives things around him or her. The fact that your case is subjective doesnt mean that it would not upset you as much or maybe even more than the other kind, but at least we know that that can be fixed. The other case, if someon loses his sight or legs or things like that, it definitively is a blow and that will not come back although also there the individual to some extent adapts himherself.
You have me to chat for as long and deep as you want, you can email me at alvaro@ya.ru so that I can get to know you better and that way you will also get to know yourself and so what upsets you know will be gone with the wind as you get over this natural stage of your life and for better moments
hugs
Alvaro
well please tlk to me..
imay not be much help,, but i care and i listen,,
i do the same as what you do,,cut and take pills,, its my comfort,
my email is suicidal.gothic.65@hotmail.com
hello there. my alias is Phoung. Its a pleasure to meet you. At the end of my comment, i’ll leave myemail; i encourage you to talk to me. You have much to talk to about. I will not judge you nor will i tell you what is wrong or not.
First off, depression can be triggered from anything to nothing. I had a friend who suffered from chronic depression and she had the life. But for some reason she was never happy. Sometimes people get depression out of no where. But no matter how it is triggered, it is always treatable. only if you put forth the effort to help yourself. Its your choice if you’re willing to do that for yourself.
And you’re right, no one will understand your pain because it is YOUR pain. everyone has different pain and “pain tolerances”. We can offer out closest empathies but we will never experiance YOUR pain. We can only try to understand from what ever you are willing to convey to us.
And dont think crying is bad. Crying (to me) is symobolic for “The Clensin of the Soul”. When you cry, it does relieve stress [for some] and it can make one feel better. Crying is a way to vent; let out all of those emotions that you have bottled up.
And there are other alternatives for cutting. 🙂 One treatmen i know is the Rubber band treatment. It works and is a good substitute for cutting. I have used that option for years and it still helps me today. The Rubber Band Treatment is also very convienent.
I check my emails daily. So i encourage you to come and tell me what is on your mind. Its up to you if you want to or not.
silly.snowball@yahoo.com