About 2 years ago my family was great. My mom had a stroke and left our family when I was six but I really didn’t care cause she’s just a cheating whore. After she left my dad started to do great in business and us 3 kids werehis only concern, he did everything for us and if we needed something he would litteraly leave that very second and do it. He was the only person Ive ever truely loved. 3 years ago he was diagnosed with cancer and it was in his lymphnodes (spelling?). In his 2 year battle with cancer I saw him go from 6’6 strong determined father to a man that had to have his 15 year old son and his brother help him use the bathroom and do things like that. He died last October. Ever since then I’ve been feeling suicidal. Hewas my best friend and every day he’s gone I just feel like telling everybody to Fuck off and not talk to me because i’ve gottento the point Where I just hate most people. But I hate myself the most. I don’t want to die but I feel like I have to so I can seemy best friend and dad again. I know my dad wentto heaven but I’m not sure if people who commit suicide will go to heaven. I realize killing myself is not the answer but WHAT THE FUCK IS THE ANSWER?! nobody knows cause this world is infested with idiots.