i have no way to go now….
what can i say? i dont know what do! there is this whole that rips me apart every night…i thought i was doing a good job not cutting but know…..i see the knife, scissors, even mirrors and there is a voice inside telling me to do, that i need it……
tell what i am supposed to do! i thought i would be all good now but……i feel alone and sad all the time and there is no apparent reason for it! i am just sad depressed…
i stared writting poems again and they all talk about pain, suicide, sorrow, hate, monsters, and betrayal…..and it all comes from inside…
Monster Monster
I feel him inside
A desire to just cry
A pain that wants me to die
A monster that kills me with a knife
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I cant stop
I cant breath
I want to do it
I want to bleedÂ
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 Monster Monster
It lives inside
It makes me bleed
It makes me die
Monster Monste
Please get out
Cause one of this days
I’ll be in the dark
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I feel like dying
I feel the knife
Then I feel free
In a dark sea
Â
Next night
I hope I die
To Kill thi Monster
I have to die
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this is how i feel, this monster inside of me that tells me that i have to and i have no strength to say no….
i do it and do it, i’ll probably loose another battle to night
i just hope that it is the cut that sends me to the deep eternal dark
5 comments
Poems are good. I had a friend who used to write all his pain in poetry. I used to do it too but I’m no good at it. Instead, I’ve written a book. Keep putting all your pain in ink; its all the thoughts that run as blood that keep your bad memories alive. If you have any more poetry I’d love to read them – either on this site or at my email. Keep strong.
sacramanianfounder@hotmail.com
You sound just like me, fighting with the demon inside, telling you that you should die, its not nice, but if you resolve this problem please tell me as I too would like to get rid of this voice. Email me helpme@live.co.uk
i really like your poetry. wanna talk? i have the same problem, i stopped cutting but it haunts me everyday, the desire is so strong, so if you wanna talk- tiger31193@aol.com
thankyou to all three i am glad you guys want to help
but i dont think that anyone can say or do anything to help me….
uhhhh i dont think thats true, maybe not but u know what everyone needs someone to be there and stuff and we can do that well at least i can if anyone understands pain, depression, sadness and all that wonderful shitty stuff its me so hit me up
e-mail mkafan12@yahoo.com