pretty much. i wanna do it, every part of me is completely calm and saying,” this is the right thing, and this is the right time. it will be quick, just go.” but i cant leave my dad to find me. so i have to abandon the perfect circumstances.
i know. thats the only reason i cant do it. ive accepted death. i dont know where i’ll go after here but it will be beautiful. so instead of causing death, i will simply choose the path of praying to a god who doesnt exisit to let me die.
Pills are never a good idea. Talking from experience here… You pass out, you wake up, vomit and then you’re alive again!! I have tried slitting my wrists too, strangely enough, my scars have gone! All this was done about 12 years ago, when i was at high school, and the bullying and discrimination got way over my head!! My parents didn’t care much about me, and they still don’t! But ive learned to live with my self loathing, yes, my state of mind does wander back and fourth from suicide to happy and back again, but whats the point in punishing your creators?! Yea, they made you the person you are today (however much they think you’re complete scum of the earth!!)
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I hope your only talking about leaving this site WishICould
ha! no.
What happened to suddenly make you decide that? Just things building up or what?
ehh i guess. im just ready to let go now.
Done holding on?
pretty much. i wanna do it, every part of me is completely calm and saying,” this is the right thing, and this is the right time. it will be quick, just go.” but i cant leave my dad to find me. so i have to abandon the perfect circumstances.
How are you planning to do it?
i was planning on pills. but my dad locks them all up now. every part of me is screaming yes but im to worried about my dad to listen to myself.
Yeah, it would be really hard for your dad, hell it would be extremely hard for any parent….
i know. thats the only reason i cant do it. ive accepted death. i dont know where i’ll go after here but it will be beautiful. so instead of causing death, i will simply choose the path of praying to a god who doesnt exisit to let me die.
So, your not going to commit suicide, or what?
im still weighing the boundries. but theres a very good chance if i can find a way. my dad has the house vaccum sealed pretty much.
I see.
What have you ruined?
Pills are never a good idea. Talking from experience here… You pass out, you wake up, vomit and then you’re alive again!! I have tried slitting my wrists too, strangely enough, my scars have gone! All this was done about 12 years ago, when i was at high school, and the bullying and discrimination got way over my head!! My parents didn’t care much about me, and they still don’t! But ive learned to live with my self loathing, yes, my state of mind does wander back and fourth from suicide to happy and back again, but whats the point in punishing your creators?! Yea, they made you the person you are today (however much they think you’re complete scum of the earth!!)