I made it through the night, sort of. Been awake since 3am more depressed than ever. I had a doctors appointment this morning about an unrelated issue but wasn’t able to make it through without breaking down, it takes about 2 sec of being around me to know something is seriously wrong and when asked it makes me think about things and I just start crying. My glimmer of hope has made me delay my plans which is good i guess, but it has also made me aware that I will continue to be in pain for longer than I had planned. I am so confused as to what to do, I want to give hope a chance but I am so tired of the depression. I am completely non-functional, I spend most days locked in my house alone curled in a ball crying. I am so confused, I wish I could just make a decision and stick with it….
2 comments
if you curl yourself in a ball as you say, you are building the environment for worsening the things. Do you think that your mind does not suffer when you lock yourself at home? You HAVE TO! go out and see the chicks their bums, or the flowers if you are not up to or the sea or buy yourself an ice cream, you have to see around the colors and the scents whatever talk to a stranger or two, input your mind with those things but dont bloodly stick in a hole in your hose staring at the corner. The mind is like a dog, you need to take it for a walk several times a day
if anyone knows hurt or pain or how u feel its me so hit me up if u wanna
e-mail mkafan12@yahoo.com