I keep playing Russian Roulette (THE SONG!) over and over again. It provokes my old thought process. I was able to write poetry for the first time in a few weeks. It was pretty intense.
I have to go to martial arts tonight. I like it a lot but I feel stupid since I’m just a beginner, and since I kind of like my instructor and this other guy in my class. But, lucky me… They’re too much older than me. The last guy I dated was 17 and he was flaky as hell! He was so annoying. And he tried to act like he knew the true meaning of depression. He had scars all on the top of his arm because his boyfriend broke up with him and he wanted to make sure he could still feel pain. I understand that, I mean he was his “first”. But then he stuck a wire coat-hanger tip in it, which I think was a little over the top. But I mean what the fuck? You think a guy breaking up with your poser ass is worse than living everyday in mental anguish because everybody treats you like you’re infectious because you’re gay? That instead of getting broken up with; you never even find someone interested in you (Except girls)? You think you know what it feels like to crave love but get your heart broken in everyway and still not have been in a relationship? Have you ever broken your own heart, *****? I didn’t think so.
Well, that was definitely too much time talking about his poser ass.
Anyway, if you like hearing me ***** you can check out my blog at lunasheart96.blogspot.com
Later