I dont know why i started cutting. But now i do it because i hate myself. I just want to know why i am so depressed. For no reason ill start to feel an intense sadness, and somtimes might start day dreaming about suicide or cutting. what the fuk is wrong with me??? half the time i want to kill my self so badly and the other half im wondering what made me think of somthing like that in the first place. its fuked up. why do i keep thinking about it and trying to do it if i always stop at the last second or just not do it, only to go through the same thing the next day. My family tries to help (except for my sister who still hasnt figured it out and wont shut up about suicide for som reason) but i just end up acting just as bitchy as my sis does. Ive tried writing about it. ive written numerous poem and storied and have even started a book just to see if it would help. But nothing works. What is wrong with me? Im so fukin conflicted!!!!!!!!!!!!!