I’m 18yrs and at th moment im nt in school i do nothng al day an cry each night….
frm as far bck i cud rememba my lyf has bn shit…at a young age i witnesd my parents fighting…my father n brothers fighting …evryone always fighting…
my father is a selfish..abusive man..and so are my brothers n older sister….she taunts me evryday telln me hw worthls i am…and i blive her, nothing gud has come out of my existance…
my mother thnks im better off dead ,my father thinks im a waste….my otha sista plots against me…nd i hv a brother wit cerebral palsy whom i hve to care for….
iv done th cutting several times, done th drugs to forget….and i luk 4 love in any form….nd i always get hurt….
my family is bynd disfunctional n i hve no frnds…im truely alne i talk to myslf evryday…to kp me sane…
i cnstantly thnk abt death… wen i cross th street i purposly try cause an accident…so tht i myt die…bt thts faild….i pray to God each nyt to end my lyf….bt he refuse.
im nt gna ax y ths is al happening …im jus accepting it….
im waitng 4 th ryt moment to use th mixture of chemicals in my cupboard….thn its ova…
i neva thot ther r othas lyk me thts y im so happy i found ths site…ths is th world of th living dead….
we cn eitha wallow in self pity or do sumthng to end it…
No shrink or diary or pills cn fix me nw
bt anyway….i doubt anyone wil tke an interest in me or my life bt it ws jus 4 a sec tht someone myt b listening to me….
5 comments
yes i am listening to you, you are not alone, there are many people going through what you are going through…..life is full of happiness and grief in turn for everyone….but anyways if you wish to talk i am here 🙂
A world of the living dead indeed.
Im n0t g0ing to tell y0u n0t to d0 it 0r whatever because i feel like that is y0ur choice to make, seeing as it is Y0UR life. But if y0u ever need t0 talk or anything, my mail is hauntedbymisery@gmail.com
I have all the time in the w0rld t0 listen(seeing as i have n0thing better t0 d0 with my life)
What kinds 0f chemicals are you using f0r your c0cktail?
Cocktail sounds delishious. And yes I know I’m sick and twisted. I everything turned out fir the est for you. (whtever “the best” may be)
thank u safe haven nd beautiful disaster….it means alot even cuming from strangers….
anythng i cud find is in it …spirits ,bleach…pesticides…al types of medication…pills… thnx 77… i wish i knew wat the best was….
I hope you find out. Soon. We all know on some level that were going to die, whether or not it be now or in 50 years. Either way were all going out one way or another. It’s the inevitable truth. I’m sorry If I’m rambling. I’m not at my most lucid right now for I havn’t actually slept in a while. But either way. I don’t think it shoul matter too much when we die as to why we died. If you can make any sence of that I congratulate you. Good luck.