I am a Christian, but struggling with these suicidal thoughts and deep depression has made me wonder why God is allowing me to suffer this way. I’ve contemplated all the possible answers- He is preparing me to help others, to make me depend on Him more, etc, but right now I just feel overwhelmed with my feelings and I am angry! I have so many friends who don’t believe in God and are much happier than I am- they do whatever they feel like doing and enjoy their lives. Why would God allow people to suffer so much without any glimmer of hope? It seems cruel.