and i dont feel safe anymore. tomorrows the last day i will wear that yellow ribbon for suicide awareness. it was a shield. against my gun. now im alone. again. im feel sad again. i cry. icry i cry i cry. my mom will cry. they will wear black at my funeral. i have til the end of the summer to turn my life around with pure luck or they will wear black to a closed casket. i still cry though. i temp myself by putting my gun to my head. loaded, cocked, ready. finger on trigger. but i dont pull. i just need to feel it. i know its there. its a label. i will not be remembered. cause no fucking one listens. not even my closest friend. she ignored me when i needeed her the most and dosent beleive me when i said i already tried once. the gun wasnt cocked. Fucking gun. Now i use a pistol. easy, fast. i dont think ill make it though. ill tell you how it goes
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3 comments
If you have a gun and your hesitating then DON’T do it, your making a mistake, believe me otherwise when you mucked up the first time with the gun you would of fixed it and pulled the trigger but you didn’t. Anything can be fixed as long you accept that you want help, please stay here for a while and talk with others, death can wait. How come you want to die?
Yes, we are listening. Get rid of the gun. Lets work on this throughout the Summer. Having the gun around brings you into a negative area of thought.
no. the gun makes me feel safe. its all i have left. i could never give it up. and i dont want help. not professionally anyway. they always blow it out of the water and act like you are diseased terrorist or something. you get treated to much different if you get pro help. thats why i came here. i just want to talk to people like me. i want to get to know you people. and your lives. im hoping that understanding others reasons and stories my help me.