I am 38 years old. My wife is 30.  She is Native American and we met at a Casino that we both were working at. I grew up close to two reservations but never knew anyone that lived there until I started working for the Casino. Since then I have seen so many young deaths on the reservation. I too get sad and depressed and feel like I can not go on. But then I think about the people I would hurt in the process. As I read some of the articles on this project website I understand that there is loneliness. It is the ultimate act for being heard. Suicide is NEVER the answer but I can understand the sadness that drives one to suicide. What I really want to understand is what can be done to prevent someone from actually going through with it. If there is one life to be saved, how do we do it? Are you not being heard? Is it mental, physical? Some people that are suicidal have devastating stories to tell. But what if you don’t and you still feel this way? What if you do have family that loves you and siblings that care for you and you still feel this way?  What can be done to prevent you from even thinking about suicide? What makes you happy or even have a brief smile? When you don’t think about it then what ARE you thinking? My heart really hurts for people and their families of people who commit suicide. If I can understand this and help others and maybe save at least one life in MY lifetime then I may too not feel this way.
I am writing this because I found my wife’s friend (who was staying with us for awhile) dead from drugs and alcohol in our home. She was 29 and Native American and we loved her. So did all of her brothers and sisters. She was trying to make something of herself. We didn’t see it coming. Then a few days ago my wife’s beautiful 19 year old niece called her mom crying and asked that she tell her she loved her. Her mom did and then heard a gun shot. She shot herself in the chest with a shotgun. She has two brothers and two sisters all younger than her. She was also Native American. In between their deaths (only months apart) there have been a number of young  adults that have lost their lives, some of them my wife’s former classmates. All of them Native American. I just want to know what is going on in their minds and what I could do to help.
5 comments
Death is the only logical conclusion to life. Because of this, perhaps there is not much you can do to help.
But perhaps there is. There is cold with hot, right and wrong, front to back…there has to be happiness where there is none. Life itself is a miracle and a mystery. I understand some have a mental illness or have had extreme pain and misery but what if you didn’t. There are always two sides to every story. The trick is to be around to have a story. Horrible things happen in this world but there are also things that make us smile, even if it is for only a second. This is what you have to cherish. Cherish it if only for a moment.
@ amadero .
i completely agree with your philosophy , to the max . there’s good and bad in every situation , right and wrong , and all things contradictory in life are just different sides of the same coin . It’s just a matter of learning to accept it and finding our own direction in life (easier said than done though) , but not forgetting to smile at the more insignificant stupid things that make us happy . Everything in this world is made up of little particles , even when relating to happiness . The most intricate things start off simple . Life is truly a miracle and a mystery (:
‘Life itself is a miracle and a mystery’
No. Life came about through a series of accidents; it certainly wasn’t a miracle. And while there may be ‘mystery’ about it, it is these mysterious questions which sometimes cause people to want to die. We will never be able to understand life, so why live it?
‘Cherish it if only for a moment’
I don’t agree with this either, because that single moment may be wonderful, but happiness isn’t constant. The rest of the time is full of the opposite. I do agree with you that one aspect cannot exist without the comparative nature of the other, but they are certainly not in balance. Sadness heavily outweighs any type of happiness that emerges, and I believe people who think otherwise cannot truly understand that in literal terms, we exist only to die.
amadero,
you are with the native people who believe spiritual comfort is one should quest for.
But history suppressed their space and motive.
The surviving living can’t live up to the hereditary doctrines, and the deceased unreconciled trying desperately to amend it on the other hand.
But the LAW prohibit messages delivered to the public from the deceased, however the gray area there is if to an individual.
Imagine how an ordinary dismantled living can even solve the gibberish messages from the beyond ?
To help someone, you’ll encounter the questions, “Who are you ? Who do you think you are ? Are you rich enough to tell me this and that ? If you’re rich, first share of what you have. If not, piss off.”
It’s ulterior motives you’ll be questioned of. It’s capabilities you’ll be questioned of.
The one thing I suggest is to strengthen yourself and your home with the light of love from your inner-self, great enough to emit from your centre of ribcage, your shoulders, your forehead, and your both palms touching your wife’s head at both sides, slowly gently rubbing her centre of eyebrows with your thumbs, letting her see that you love her. While you still have your chance.
In the casino, where the evil thoughts all flying, you could just tell the losers, before they lose all, first to have a hot soup, a better spirit, to come back only when they are energized enough.
Those are the things you can help as an individual.
The sacred world issues are left for the stars, the president, the pope, etc.
And then wish they could do more help than damage.
We just can’t literally hand our love openly to a pathetic without curse.
We could only do it anonymously, or unobstrusively.
Because everyone has his own course.
And I just wish my stupidity of dreaming living in an honest world is ever never a bubble.
And thanks for knowing someone like you that care.