another story

You know what, killmetosaveyourself, I know exactly what you mean. I can’t say that I’ve felt the same way, about not wanting to live since childhood for no apparent reason, but I sympathize with what you’ve said. I think that I’m accurate in saying that you don’t sincerely want to die, though. You’re obviously seeking help, afterall. But what you have almost conclusively decided is that you’d rather live no life than the one you’re currently living and the one you’ve been living with. Ofcourse, you might have an ideal life in mind. A fantasy, if you will. And you’d like to live it. Since it seems to be unattainable, or unattainable anytime soon, you figure that it’s just not worth the hassle and pain of going through the motions everytday only to be full of misery. I understand that completely. Is what I’ve said so far pretty fair?

And I know what it’s like to give up on prospects. They seem so damn distant sometimes, and then you curse because you realize that you’d have to go through hell to achieve them, if at all. Depression is one hell of a handicap that makes it hell to achieve, btw. I understand that too, and you don’t need to feel obligated to do anything, including to live or to die.

So what can I, or anyone else, suggest to help you? We can suggest a lot of things, but the one’s that seem plain or “no duh” I would just throw in the garbage while acknowledging that they took the time and cared to respond. It’s all perception and if you can fool yourself into optimism, feed off of it and run with it. If that doesn’t work out, well we’re here, buddy. Here to help the best we can. It’s something. Idk if it’s enough to live for, but sometimes a little compassion goes a long way.

I recommend physical fitness. I lift weights and sing. It helps.