Hi I’m Nick. I’ll try to keep this short, sweet, and to the point. I started having suicidal thoughts 4 years ago. I really didn’t have a good reason. I just wasn’t happy with my life and I felt really alone. Over time things got better and I wanted to live. I started being around my family more which really helped. And after I blew my knee out playing football I started to coach Special Olympics football and basketball. I found my passion and that was to be a coach. If something was bothering me and I felt depressed, sports was always there and it always made me feel good. Sports was my anti-depressant. Well in June of 2009 my only older brother got out of prison. I was extremly excited because I loved to hang out with him and see him. During the time when he was in prison we always wrote letters to each other. In his letters he talked a lot about how he was a changed person and that the old him is dead and there his someone new coming home. During the summer him and I always hung out and did stuff together. Long story short he wasn’t even 3 months out and he relapsed. It was the biggest dissapointment of my life. I couldn’t even hear his voice without getting frustrated. So in November I fell in love with my best friend. She is everything I ever wanted in someone. In April younger brother and sister pack up and leave without notice. It shattered my heart because I love them very much and I don’t know when I’ll get to see them again. Two days after they left my love left me. It was just out of nowhere. It killed me. I got so bad that I wasn’t enjoying anything anymore. The fun things I used to do weren’t fun anymore. Not even my coaching. I went to see a doctor and they ranke me in the very severe depression area.  So I got onto some medication to help me. I wanted to feel better. It’s been two months and I’ve gotten worse. I feel extremly alone. I don’t see what the point of living is. I know there are lots of people that love me and care about me but I am just walking around in all this pain. I feel extremly empty inside. I hate my life. I don’t want to be here anymore. At the same time I hate to give up on things. I am a coach, I don’t believe in quitting. But I’ve gotten so bad that I just can’t do it anymore. I’d rather be dead then walking around like this. Someone please give me some inspiring words. Someone please help me. Thanks…
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Life is tough and we we all know this; but let me tell you something. You have to believe in yourself, Nick. The things that don’t last in your life are not meant to be in your life. Everything happens for a reason and the key to get through it is to know that something better awaits you in the future. Ans sadness is a good thing. Without it, happiness would not be known. I can promise you that if you do your best to stay strong, things will get better faster. And just find someone to spill everything out to. Talking always helps. It’s not good to hold everything in. Some things just happen for the best.
I don’t know if you’re religious, but turning to God helps a lot of people. And remember you are not alone, there are so many people out there who know what you are going through, including me, and people are willing to help. You are making an impact people because you are a coach and people look up to you. Some people even envy you because you have the ability to lead others to a happy ending and that’s a very good thing.
As for your brother, my older brother just got sentenced to 7 years in prison and he’s been there before. He’s come out different but just ended up back the way he was, so I can relate to that.
And the love of your life will always be there waiting for you somewhere. And if your best friend and you were meant to be then she will be back. Just stay strong and be you. Like you said, people love you. I know it’s really hard to stay strong when you really need to be. When you face challenges in life instead of running away or digging for a way out, things in the future become easier to deal with because you’ve gone through something worse. If you need anything else, or anyone to talk to , I’d be glad to be of help. You can contact me at a.m.lapietra@gmail.com.
You’ve gon through a shitload.
Just remeber, when the whip comes cracking down your still a person.
I’ve lost so many people to death and lies, it hurts. But new happiness comes.
Be patient and good luck
Life is constantly moving forward and it never stops, all you need is time to get over this situation.
Good luck
I agree with what the previous person said. You will get over it in time. It’s just harder because your brother, sister, lover all left you at the same time. Be grateful for the people you still have in your life, and the people who are looking up to you now.