I’m 10 years old…in the fifth grade. I’m not suicidal. I do think life can suck, but I believe that you just need to live with the pain. Even though I’ve never considered suicide, I used to cut myself and sometimes still do. Anyway, this is about my best friend. Not me.
Her name is Amanda. Don’t worry…she didn’t die from suicide. But she’s suicidal. She has a lot of money troubles at home, the guy she loves is going to middle school (our elementary school goes up to sixth grade and he’s in the sixth going on seventh), and she believes everybody hates her (or at least a lot of people). She smiles almost all the time, but she says it hides the pain. She claims she’s emo, or as she calls it, emolicious. She also wheres goth clothes, but it doesn’t look very goth because her mom won’t let her. She listens to goth music too.
At first, I thought when she admitted she’s suicidal, that it was just something from being goth/emo, like she had to be suicidal to be that. But she’s only been like that for about a year, and the music she listens to influenced her to be like that. But she told me she’s been suicidal since she was in second grade. She’s never attempted suicide, but she’s highly considered it.
Amanda’s smart, funny, pretty, nice, she has good friends. I don’t understand why she feels life is worthless. Her friends love her very much and I feel the world needs her her.